The Washington Times - October 19, 2007, 03:48PM
Hillary’s Woodstock Museumwon’t be funded by Congress. SEE RELATED:


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•••\ \ Do you know anyone who would actually want their junior high student to have unfettered access to birth control? We are not a prude and we are a realist, but c’mon. That makes us kind of sick.\

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•••\ \ News we can all use: The Spice Girls’ new video is slated to hit Nov. 2. Please calendar this important date now.\

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•••\ \ Tiger Woods has endorsed Gatorade Tiger, a new flavor. We wonder how it mixes. Around the 8th or 9th hole, close to the Windmill, we enjoy an adult bev. It makes us forget how bad we can be at Putt-Putt.\

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•••\ \ Our new heroes: Adrian and Tiffany McKinnon, of Montgomery, Ala., who came home to find a burglar in their home. They held him at gunpoint and made him clean up the mess he’d made when he ransacked their place. The burglar actually complained to police who told him lesser folks would have shot him right there. We think he should be forced by the court to come back and fix their house until it’s perfect. Making him work would be some actual justice. We also think the TSA folks who mess up our perfectly packed princess gear at the airport must be required to repack it the same way they found it. AS IF.\

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•••\ \ The FBI has raided magician David Copperfield’s warehouse in Vegas amid allegations of sexual assault — in Washington State. We wonder what they were looking for. He has always struck us as an extremely odd bug, just kinda creepy in that unexplainable way.\

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•••\ \ Brit singer Amy Winehouse has been arrested for pot possession. This is not her first scrape with the law. Last summer, as a sworn officer in the fashion police, we issued her a citation for her “artistry” with eyeliner and her overuse of ballerina flats. She pleaded no contest, citing hairspray issues.\

\ Andrea Billups, The Washington Times