The Washington Times - May 4, 2012, 01:28PM

Friday

Just bought 3 boxes of Wheaties — 1 with Ali, 1 with Jenner + 1 with M.L. Retton. Gonna see which one makes me feel most like a champion.

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Let the record show I was badmouthing Brandon Meriweather from the moment he tweeted he was in D.C. to talk to the #Redskins#NFL  #Pats

With Bryce Harper getting called up, anybody want to guess the last hitter to debut for a Washington #MLB team at 19 or younger? #Nats  #MLB

Answer: Jeff Burroughs. He was 19 in 1970 when he played his first #MLB game for Ted Williams’ #Senators. The box: http://bit.ly/JG3HVj

Burroughs went 0 for 3 that day vs. #Brewers. Batted 6th, played RF. All 3 AB were vs. Al Downing, who later gave up Aaron’s 715th HR. #Nats

Interesting: There was a player named Harper who played in Burrough’s debut — Tommy Harper, the #Brewers‘ third baseman. #Nats

Interesting, Part 2: Burroughs’ manager, Ted Williams, hit 43 HR in 1949. Harper’s manager, Davey Johnson, hit 43 HR in 1973. #Nats

Saturday

The #Redskins draft a 2nd QB (Cousins)? In 1959 they drafted 3. The 3rd was Joe Kapp, who went to CFL and later led #Vikings to Super Bowl.

Of course, in 1959 the draft was 30 rounds. You could draft 3 of just about everything if you wanted to. #Redskins

With 3 OL picks already, the #Redskins have made it clear they’re never going be undermanned in that area again, especially w/ #RG3at QB.

Just came up with a solution to the #NFL’s concussion problem: Require all players to grow their hair out like Cher. http://bit.ly/Kj2wGm

Possible scenario: 2 years from now, #RG3 is a star, Kyle gets a head coaching job somewhere, Dad lets him take Cousins with him. #Redskins

By looking utterly hopeless at the plate, I think Espinosa is just trying to take the pressure off Bryce. There’s a teammate for you. #Nats

The way he’s swinging the bat tonight, Espinosa would have a hard time getting a hit off Barbara Billingsley. #Nats #LeaveItToBeaver

Sunday

#Redskins taking QBs in Rounds 1 + 4 is nothing like #Cowboys taking QBs in Round 1 (Aikman) + Round 1 of Supplemental (Walsh) in ‘89. #NFL

The Walsh pick cost DAL its 1st-rounder in ‘90, which would have been No. 1 overall. So they spent 2 No. 1 picks on QBs in ‘89. #Redskins

FYI: The #Rams turned the #Redskins‘ picks into DT Michael Brockers, CB Janoris Jenkins, RB Isaiah Pead + OG Rokevious Watkins. More to come.

Be interesting to see what final body count is in #RG3 deal. If #Ramstrade down the No. 1s in ‘13/‘14, could hit double figures. #Redskins

Something for Harper to shoot at: Mantle was 3rd in MVP voting at 20 — behind 2 pitchers. So he was best AL position player at 20. #Nats

Monday

Memo to #Redskins: Celebrating franchise anniversaries every 5 years gets really old. Try celebrating a championship sometime. #NFL

I keep waiting for the Birthers to descend on #BryceHarper, claiming he isn’t really 19 and may not even have been born in Vegas. #Nats

James Johnson didn’t even have time to go through a tube of toothpaste before leaving #Clemson and returning to #VirginiaTechhoops. #Hokies

Hopefully, Johnson will replace Seth Greenberg’s 9-8-7 offense. It was called that, I’m told, because the crowd … #Hokies

… was always counting down “9 … 8 … 7 …” before the #Hokies  did anything with the ball. #VirginiaTech

I’d say Game 2 is pretty darn important for the #Caps. These ain’t the ‘09/‘11 #Rangers. Don’t want to be down 2-love to these guys. #NFL

Is anybody really surprised the #NFLDraft got better ratings in DC than #Caps vs. #Bruins finale? The draft has become the Academy Awards.

Returning to #Hokies‘ new hoops coach, it’s a shame James Johnson is taking the over program at a time when Dell Curry has run out of sons.

My message to the #Caps going into the 3rd period is: It’s not about winning four games, it’s about NOT LOSING four. Ya folla? #Rangers #NHL

5 minutes left in a 1-goal playoff game (#Caps 3, #Rangers 2). If this isn’t a reason for living, I don’t know what is. #NHL

After the game, I want somebody to time Mike Knuble’s mad sprint to avoid that icing call a bit ago. The Ol’ Man can still motor. #Caps #NHL

So tough in these playoffs to hold serve on your home ice in Games 1-2. The teams are just so close in ability. #Caps 3, #Rangers 2. #NHL

With reduced ice time for Ovechkin, it’s almost like Hunter is DH-ing him. It certainly paid off tonight — with the game-winning goal. #Caps

Hey, this is the first time in Ovechkin Era the #Caps have been up a break in 2nd round. (Led #Pens 2-0 in ‘09, but both wins at home.) #NHL

That’s 8 one-goal games in 9 playoff games for #Caps (Won 5, Lost 3). In ‘98 run to Finals, had 11 in 21 games (Won 5, Lost 6). #Rangers  #NHL

Tuesday

The #Redskins have reportedly gotten rid of another member of their 2011 “playoff-caliber offense” (in the words of Shanny): Jabar Gaffney.

Does anybody else think Yards After Catch is an overrated stat (e.g. Gaffney’s 2.7 in ‘11)? … #Redskins

Only 16 WRs with 60+ catches last season had a higher yards-per-catch average (13.9) than Gaffney. It’s about advancing the ball. #Redskins

Axing Gaffney not necessarily bad move, but YAC can be inflated by running a lot of underneath routes (that don’t gain 13.9 yds). #Redskins

And please, spare me the glorification of Shanahan’s “scheme” as an explanation for Gaffney’s stats. He had Rex + Becks as QBs. #Redskins

At any rate, the bar has been set. Will either Garcon or Morgan catch 68 balls next season for 947 yards and 5 TD? #Redskins

You have to understand, genius coaches see most WRs as very replaceable. It’s all about the profundity of their X’s and O’s. #Redskins

Here’s where Gaffney ranked in 2011 in the yards-per-catch department, btw, among WR with 60+ receptions: http://goo.gl/neijd  #Redskins

Most catches by #NFL WR, last 3 seasons: 21. Gaffney 187 (2,554 yds., 13.66 avg., 9 TD), 22. Garcon 184 (2,496/13.57/16). #Redskins

Here are those rankings — of the most catches by an #NFL WR in the last 3 seasons: http://bit.ly/ID5D1Q #Redskins

Would love to see a Farmers Insurance commercial in which J.K. Simmons says, “Fire extinguishers? We don’t cover those.” #Stoudemire #NBA

It’s great to be able to watch #BryceHarper hit tonight without a naked butt in the background. #Nats #Dodgers #MLB

Does #RG3 need a nickname (aside from RG3, I mean)? I suppose the Waco Kid is taken. http://bit.ly/IDwQ4r #Redskins #NFL #Baylor

Wednesday

Warren Sapp a TV judge? The HOF committee better vote him in on the 1st ballot, otherwise he’ll send them to the electric chair. #Bucs  #NFL

Here at Verizon Center, anxiously waiting for Alex Ovechkin to land the first quadruple Axel in #NHL playoff competition. #Caps #Rangers

1-1 score, 26-26 in shots. Close enough for ya? #Caps #Bruins #NHL

It was only a matter of time before the #Caps had another overtime game. I mean, they hadn’t had one in 7 whole days. #Bruins  #NHL

To the second OT we go. I went to a #Caps playoff game and the D.C. Marathon broke out. #Rangers #NHL

The chanting late in the 1st OT for Braden Holtby reminded me that this is becoming a BH town — him and Bryce Harper. #Caps #Nats  #NHL #MLB

So … who’s gonna get tired first? Isn’t that what it’s pretty much come down to between the #Caps and #Rangers#NHL

The #Caps and #Rangers have met so often in the playoffs that I don’t even have to think anymore about how to spell Lundqvist. #NHL

It seems like John Carlson’s equalizer was scored at about 10 this morning. Know what I mean? #Caps #Rangers #NHL

Can this game please be won by a great play? Don’t hand me happenstance after fabulous hockey like this. #Caps #Rangers #NHL

If this game goes on much longer, the #Caps are going to start selling 2013-14 season tickets. #Rangers #NHL

Not only should the refs put their whistles away, all speed cameras in DC should be deactivated for the rest of the night. #Caps #Rangers

Triple OT. A doubleheader! The #Caps should offer free blood-pressure screening between periods. #Rangers #NHL

I’m gonna check my retirement to see how much it’s gone up during this hockey game. Maybe I don’t have to stick around till the end. #Caps

By the time this game is over, Ovie is going to be able to speak English fluently. #Caps #Rangers #NHL

Wonder how many fans at Verizon have reached drinking age since this game began. #Caps #Rangers #NHL

I honestly think the goalie’s mask was invented during this game. I don’t recall Holtby wearing one at the start. #Caps #Rangers #NHL

Not to worry, #Caps fans. I’ve just been informed that Nicklas Backstrom is still under contract. #Rangers #NHL

I’m told that if the game had gone to a seventh period, Roman Hamrlik could have become a naturalized citizen. #Caps #Rangers #NHL

Thursday

What’s the deal with Jose Bautista? Has he basically turned from Buddy Love back into Sherman Klump? #Jays #MLB

There’s plenty of blame to go around in the #Bountygate scandal, but Just Following Orders is the lamest excuse in human history.#NFL  #NFLPA

If #NFL owners are undecided about activating guys from IR, it might just be a hypersensitivity to anything having to do w/ injured players.

“The next best thing to a lie is a true story nobody will believe.” — Joe Palmer, famed N.Y. Herald Tribune sportswriter #KentuckyDerby

Jim Murray called them “blobs.” They abound in the Twitterverse, the great sportswriter would have discovered… .

And what are “blobs”? Murray: “People [who] don’t really want to know. They prefer their certitudes, no matter how shakily based.”

Worse, Murray once wrote, “blobs … have a life of their own. They grow even if you try to cut off their heads. They’re ineradicable.”

If you are a “blob,” or even thinking of becoming a “blob,” please take your blobness somewhere else. This is a No Blob Zone. Thank you.

Bryce Harper, 19, is batting 3rd tonight for the #Nats. Most 19-year-olds would be thrilled to be 3rd in their Rotisserie League draft.

Who am I? In my 1st playoff game, I threw a 1-hitter. I’ve led the NL in WHIP and the AL in ERA. I’m 8-22 since 2010. #MLB

Answer: Kevin Millwood. Threw 1-hitter for #Braves vs. Astros in ‘99 playoffs. Had 0.996 WHIP that year, 2.86 ERA for #Indians in ‘05. #MLB

19-yr-old Bryce Harper vs. 19-yr-old Mickey Mantle: Bryce has 4 2B in 5 games. Mick didn’t get his 4th extra-base hit until Game 15. #Nats

308 of Mantle’s 386 PA as rookie were as 1 or 2 hitter. Had just 36 PA in 3 spot, where Harper is tonight. Of course, ‘51 Yanks won WS. #Nats

The big thing with Mantle was that he had 13 HR at 19. But then, Yankee Stadium was made for LH hitters (296 down RF line) … #Nats

… and Mickey had more ups from the left side than the right. #Nats

If the #Caps can come back on the #Rangers, there might not be a team in the Final Four above a 4th seed. How’s that for incentive? #NHL

Came across a great quote once uttered by Willie Davis, the #PackersHall of Famer: “I try to play so that I can live with myself.” #NFL