The Washington Times - April 28, 2011, 04:54PM

There was a time when truth, justice and the American way was what Superman was all about. But you can drop the third item from that list. In Action Comics #900, the Man of Steel plans on renouncing his U.S. citizenship before the United Nations and becoming a citizen of the world.

Superman’s beef is that he is “tired of having [his] actions construed as instruments of U.S. policy.” In particular the Islamic regime in Iran accused the United States of committing an act of war when Superman showed up to give nonviolent support to Iranian dissidents. Of course it’s easy to be a nonviolent protester when riot batons bounce right off your head. There is no particular bravery involved. And the dissidents could rightly ask Superman what value he brings to the effort if he isn’t going to help them change the regime using all the powers at his disposal. If anything, showing up and doing nothing is an accurate reflection of the Obama administration’s Iran policy. Apparently Superman seems to think he has become some type of global spokesman for morality, but really, without bending steel with his bare hands and his other powers he’s just some full-of-himself guy in a cape.

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If Superman is no longer on our side the only reasonable government response is to make sure he cannot harm the United States. The Defense Department should embark on a program to harness the power of kryptonite in various forms to provide a robust series of options should Superman decide that something the United States is up to does not pass his new rarefied sense of internationalist propriety. Perhaps Lex Luthor, wherever he is, would be interested in an amnesty deal in exchange for some of the anti-Superman technologies he has developed over the years. The government should also stockpile whatever types of kryptonite are available, and issue a statement to the supervillains of the universe that the United States is no longer responsible for Superman’s actions. Clark Kent’s new tax status will have to be determined by the IRS.

So long Superman, you illegal alien ingrate.

 

Superman