- The Washington Times - Wednesday, October 18, 2000

Analyzing Bubba

President Clinton had to lie on the couch sooner or later.

World renowned psychoanalyst Dr. Jorge De Gregorio, director of the Freudian Research Center in New York and Buenos Aires, has written an eye-opening book exploring the unconscious as it relates to Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky providing a map to the "otherwise inexplicable behavior" of seemingly ordinary people, in particular Mr. Clinton.

In "My Head and My Heart: Sex, Love, Life and the Unconscious" (Random House, $24.95), the doctor writes that by the time Mr. Clinton and Miss Lewinsky met and had their passionate first encounter according to the records, Nov. 15, 1995 the president had endured a year of misfortune.

On Jan. 6, 1994, less than a year after Mr. Clinton moved into the White House, his mother, Virginia always his fundamental source of love and enthusiasm died of breast cancer. That same year, Hillary Rodham Clinton's health care reform proposal what many expected to be the "crown jewel of the presidency" crashed and burned.

"President Clinton's potential for re-election was now at stake," explains the doctor.

"During her husband's first term at the White House, Hillary had had to face a growing shadow that threatened to envelop her: her father, dead; her friend, Vince Foster, dead; her health care reform, dead. The Whitewater scandal was becoming an increasing issue in the press," Dr. De Gregorio wrote.

At this point, Mr. Clinton had no choice but to "fire" his longtime political partner, Hillary, the other half of his 1992 ticket or else Mrs. Clinton fired herself. "Hillary had … virtually unseated Vice President Al Gore," the author wrote.

Out of the shadow, the doctor continues, "there emerged Monica Lewinsky as a shining light, who by means of a burning passion invested the president of the United States with the youthful potency he needed. Going beyond any barriers, both generational and situational, the president reconstructed himself through the unconscious meaning of these encounters."

But why Nov. 15, of all days at the White House, to succumb to Miss Lewinsky's advances?

It was the first full day of "the Great Government shutdown of '95," when 800,000 federal workers were furloughed, the doctor wrote.

"Never in American history had there been a shutdown of this magnitude," when only indispensable employees, unpaid workers and interns continued to work. One of those interns was Miss Lewinsky.

"This must have been for President Clinton a profoundly painful state, coming as it did at a difficult time for him: 800,000 people reproaching him. He may also have felt his own 'shutdown.'

"Looking in the mirror for the ideal, his head could have felt on the brink of breaking; he would see a loss of self-image, his whole self crumbling."

Great pumpkin

Our source happened to be standing next to Rep. Rick Lazio at the Kingston Rotary's Pumpkin Festival in Ulster County, N.Y., when the Republican senatorial candidate suddenly came face-to-face with a guy sporting a Hillary Clinton mask.

You can imagine Mr. Lazio's horror when turning and seeing "Hillary" up close and personal.

The impersonator carried a sign, "Motel 1600 Check In," offering Lincoln Bedroom discounts and a "free copy of your FBI file" with every overnight stay.

Counting chickens

Despite Vice President Al Gore's lagging behind in most presidential polls, the Gore 2000 campaign, hours before last night's third and final presidential debate, decided to take a bullish approach in these crucial final weeks before the election.

"You're invited to join the Next President of the United States Al Gore, and his wife Tipper Gore this Wednesday, October 18th, in downtown Flint, Michigan," the Gore camp wrote in a rather optimistic news release.

Samoa warrior

For his next career, Delegate Eni F.H. Faleomavaega, American Samoa Democrat, ought to grab a microphone and enter the ring.

When most lawmakers took the floor of the House to talk about Medicare, Social Security and winding up the 106th Congress, Mr. Faleomavaega spoke of a monster that "weighs 250 pounds," "neckless," with "legs and calves like tree trunks," who "drives a Volkswagen from the back seat," and "eats green bananas and wears a skirt."

Boxer David Tua, in other words, a Western Samoa native who is training for his Nov. 11 world heavyweight title fight against champion Lennox Lewis.

"It is against Samoan tradition to be boastful and arrogant, but as a totally neutral observer and with all due respect, Lennox Lewis is going to painfully wake up the next morning and count how many ribs he has left, and then he will wonder if he was hit by either a dump truck or a D9[R] Caterpillar tractor," boasts the delegate.

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