- Unleash the crossbows: Gov. Scott Walker creates new hunting season
- Bubonic plague kills 20 in Madagascar
- G-20 diplomats fell for hacker attack promising nude photos of former French first lady Carla Bruni
- Minnesota guardsman charged with stealing private soldier data for fake IDs
- Florida appeals court rules universities can’t regulate guns
- Vladimir Putin defends Russian conservative values
- Tea Party Patriots call key GOP firing a declaration of war
- 68,000 more file for unemployment — in one week
- Michigan bans in-state insurers from covering abortion
- Nancy Pelosi tells Democrats to pass budget: ‘Embrace the suck’
One ‘Ring’ too many adds up to ‘Two’
Question of the Day
“The Ring,” 2002’s overrated but creepy affair based on the 1998 Japanese film “Ringu,” had the advantage of wowing audiences weaned on mindless Jason/Freddy/Michael fests.
It also spawned a rash of horror films featuring partially obscured children with unkempt hair and milky pallors.
Now, inevitably, we get “The Ring Two”
title is cq, per imdb.coms shock value is yesterday’s news.
While lesser horror sequels like the “Nightmare on Elm Street” installments offer built-in thrills (just how will Freddy dispatch our pulchritudinous heroines this time?) all “The Ring Two” can muster is an angry mob of deer and one too many rerun frights.
That’s too bad, because rare is the horror franchise told with the level of craft, and lack of bloodletting, we get with these “Rings.” Nor do all horror films have gorgeous heroines like Naomi Watts who can act rings around any scream queen since Jamie Lee Curtis.
The film’s producers tried one noteworthy wrinkle for the sequel. Hideo Nakata, who directed “Ringu,” takes over for Gore Verbinski. However, Mr. Nakata’s handiwork looks like every other American effort, neatly packaged but lacking any of the elements that make the international handoff worthwhile.
Miss Watts returns as Rachel, the journalist who watched a cursed videotape promising death seven days later for those who view it.
The original “Ring” followed Rachel as she investigated — and solved — the tape’s origins before her time ran out. Here, both Rachel and her otherworldly son Aidan (David Dorfman) have moved to a new city to leave those horrors behind, but evil spirits apparently possess global positioning system (GPS) tracking. It doesn’t take long for a “Ring”-like death to strike Rachel’s new neighborhood, tipping her off that her flight didn’t escape the sinister spirit’s notice.
That spirit, a little girl murdered by her parents, now wants to inhabit the body of poor Aidan.
Miss Watts registers the mandatory fear and loathing toward the deathly pale girl, while her screen son remains a calculated figure meant to tease the plot along without resembling an actual child.
The whole concept that those who watch the bewitched videotape (and shouldn’t we be talking DVD by now?) die seven days later is gone in “The Ring Two.” So, too, is any rhyme or reason behind the spirit’s wrath toward Rachel and Aidan.
Modern horror movies ultimately fail us by introducing all-powerful evils who nonetheless take their sweet time eliminating the good guys. It’s like those arrogant Bond villains who — to paraphrase “The Incredibles” — monologue themselves silly, thereby giving the good guys time to escape.
Even with that handicap, “The Ring Two” makes us jump a time or two, especially at the thought of Sissy Spacek demeaning herself with the kind of twitchy, affected cameo well beneath an Oscar-winning actress.
The screening audience chuckled when, near the film’s conclusion, a character muttered, “it’s over.”
By Matt Kibbe
The short-term deal will assure long-term overspending
- Obama's Afghanistan experts stumped on U.S. death toll, war costs during hearing
- NAPOLITANO: A conspiracy so vast
- Biden guarantees victory on immigration reform
- All-out war breaks out in GOP over budget pact
- MALCOLM/REIMER: Over-criminalization undermines respect for legal system
- Selfie at heart of Obama fiasco to stay secret
- Obama takes 'selfie' at Mandela's funeral service
- Rand Paul: Budget deal 'shameful,' 'huge mistake'
- Fake interpreter at Mandela service: 'Sorry,' I have schizophrenia
- DIVEST! Oil is the new apartheid on college campuses
Independent voices from the The Washington Times Communities
The Career Doctor Cassi Fields prescribes valuable advice for anyone looking to find a career, nail an interview or earn a promotion.
The Constitution: Every issue, every time. No exceptions, no excuses. And how to get from here to there.
Film Reviews and Articles by Kevin Williams
The world impacts us. What happens in our towns, cities, states, country and on this planet makes a difference to us.
Extraordinary day at Redskins Park
White House pets gone wild!
Let it snow