‘Thrill of the Chaste’

Dawn Eden’s conversion from her lifestyle of casual sex resulted in her writing “The Thrill of the Chaste: Finding Fulfillment

While Keeping Your Clothes On,” which hit shelves Tuesday.

Miss Eden is a deputy news editor at the New York Daily News and a former rock historian. The following are excerpts from an interview:

Question: Your book is titled “The Thrill of the Chaste.” Is that possible: Finding a thrill in being chaste?

Answer: It’s definitely possible. You have to find a thrill in being chaste before you can find a thrill in anything else. We all start life as chaste children, and then as we grow up … sometimes we lose touch with the things that are at the root of happiness. …

Q: But you’re not a virgin yourself, are you?

A: Oh, my book is not about virginity. It’s about how chastity isn’t just for virgins. No, I’m not one myself.

Q: What makes you qualified to speak on this? Has there been a change in course?

A: Oh, there definitely has been a change in course. I grew up Reformed Jewish, and I was an agnostic for my adult life until I was 31, when I had a transformative faith experience. I became a Christian and I believed for the first time that there was a God and that God really cared about me. … I realized that my lifestyle was not in line with my faith. …

Changing is … not as easy as simply stopping doing something. … Change really comes from the inside out. …

Even if you don’t really feel happy declining opportunities for sex … if you work on the inside, you can become happier. … If you have to change from within, you have to change your behavior. And at the same time, if you’re changing your behavior, you have to work on your inside so that you’re doing things for the right reasons. …

Q: How can you present this message of chastity without evoking images of boring, high-collared dresses and Jane Austen characters? ..

A: Being chaste is enjoying every aspect of life and not just focusing one’s attention on, “I have to have this man for my boyfriend or husband … and if I don’t have that object — that male object upon whom my life is focused — I won’t be happy.” …

Women’s magazines tell women just to go for it, and they tell women not to just, you know, center their lives around a man. … They give that message on the one hand and on the other hand, “Wear this lipstick, and he’ll want you.” So, you know, they’re talking out of both sides of their mouth. …

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