No thanks, we’re stupid

John Stuart Mill once famously called the British Tories “The Stupid Party.” From time to time since then, the Tory’s American cousin, the Republican Party, has also earned that moniker. Now may be one of those moments. If current polls and anecdotes are to be believed, there may be a million or two conservative Republicans who are planning to not vote this November.

Of course, Mill also said that : “A person may cause evil to others not only by his actions but also by his inaction, and in either case he is justly accountable to them for the injury.”

Apparently, these anticipated conservative non-voters are annoyed with Republican imperfection. They are disheartened, disappointed, disillusioned, distempered, dismal — and thus plan to dis the party that better advances conservative principles in government.

They appear to have fallen victim to the false syllogism: 1) Something must be done; 2) not voting is something; therefore, 3) I will not vote.

Of course the fallacy of the syllogism is that the second category could be anything. For example, number two could as well read “eating dog excrement is something.” I rather suspect that they will feel about the same afterward, whether they chose the non-voting option or the scatological one. They are both equally illogical — and repulsive — and would deserve the moniker, “Stupid.”

Here are some tell-tale signs of the sort of person who would vote (or not vote) to cause the election of a party which would act to defeat every value and interest he holds dear (merely because the party that will at least try to advance most of those issues has not done as well as he might have hoped):

1) When offered by a car dealer 25 percent off on a car, he insists on paying the full factory recommended retail sticker price — because he is damned if he will accept 25 percent when he deserves 30 percent off.

2) When the prettiest cheerleader asks the nerd to take her to the prom, he turns her down — just because he can.

3) When stopped for doing 70 in a 65 zone, he tells the trooper that’s not possible because he had the cruise control set on 90 — he just resents being falsely charged.

4) When diagnosed with a serious illness, he promptly cancels his medical insurance — in order to save the cost of premium payments to help pay for the upcoming hospital stay.

A conservative would have to be just that stupid to stay home on Nov. 7.

I have heard it put around that the Republicans need a couple of years in the wilderness to regain their conservative bearings.

While turning over the Congress to the Pelosi/Kennedy mob for even two years would be recklessly irresponsible — particularly during a dangerous war — there is no assurance the wilderness years would last only twenty-four months.

In 1954, the Democrats, led by the great Sam Rayburn, retook the House after control had see-sawed back and forth for ten years (1944 — Democrat; 1946 — Republican; 1948 — Democrat; 1950 — Democrat; 1952 — Republican; 1954 — Democrat). Mr. Rayburn (one of the shrewdest politicians ever to play the game) was so sure that the Republicans would take back the House in the Eisenhower re-election year of 1956, that when he became speaker after the 1954 election, he didn’t even bother to move his furniture back to the better office suite occupied by Joe Martin (the Republican speaker who returned to minority leader status after the 1954 Republican loss.)

They decided to keep their previous office spaces rather than go through the bother of moving across the hall.

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