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If they could channel their energy in a more productive manner than conspiracy theories, they possibly would be richer in spirit and resources.

But such an approach would be counter to their dour dispositions.

Being snarky is the cyberspace equivalent of being so cool, so with it, so happening, although you would not want to have a beer with the authors.

They would be too consumed with sating their technological addictions to have time to engage a live human being in genuine dialogue.

No other professional sports league attracts conspiracy theorists the way the NBA does.

That is partly because the game is nearly impossible to officiate, the subjective element of it is pronounced and it celebrates the individual far more than football and baseball.

You see, Stern desperately wanted LeBron James to reach the NBA Finals last June on the corporate say-so of Nike.

That explains why the Pistons, inexplicably, were unable to play at their customary high level in the conference finals.

If you go by this strained logic — that Stern orchestrates outcomes to best suit the NBA as a whole — then James never should have been allowed to go to Cleveland.

You have to figure James would have served the purposes of the NBA far better as a member of the Knicks than the Cavaliers.

But the lottery did not go down in that fashion, and James went to Cleveland, and Mike Sweetney went to New York.

Stern also has been unable to fix that which is broken with the Lakers, which undoubtedly hurts the NBA.

And if Stern were thinking truly big — and the league does have offices in Paris, Tokyo, Taipei, Hong Kong, Beijing and Shanghai — he probably would have had Yao Ming advance beyond the first round of the playoffs by now.

You cannot overstate enough the importance of the 1 billion-plus market of China.

These small details are nowhere near as much fun as the conspiracy theory of the moment.

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