- The Washington Times - Friday, May 4, 2007

Spotted on the Churchill Downs backside Thursday morning: A fake Howard Cosell, a fake Queen Elizabeth II and the real O.J. Simpson.

The real Cosell has been deceased for years and the real Queen was in Richmond/Williamsburg before arriving here for today’s race. The real Juice — undoubtedly taking a break from trying to find his ex-wife’s “real” killers — has been to several Derbies.

The Juice and fake Queen have a history, of course. Sir Scribble was in the eighth grade when he saw “Naked Gun” in a packed auditorium in Port Huron, Mich., that included the national anthem before the previews and an intermission even though the movie was 95 minutes, tops.

Elsewhere, the bullets kept flying Thursday with two more shootings. There were two shootings here earlier this week that included the cops killing two people. Sir Scribble has been to Miami for the Super Bowl (no real incidents) and Las Vegas for the NBA All-Star Game (Pacman Jones “made it rain” at a strip club and caused some havoc) and hadn’t read about the kind of mayhem gripping Louisville this week.

Speaking of Vegas, MGM Mirage Inc. reported a four-percent decrease in first-quarter earnings. CEO Terry Lanni blamed the NBA All-Star Game.

“The gang-bangers and others who came for purposes other than attending the game, they weren’t very good for Las Vegas,” he told the Associated Press.

Lanni said there was little table action on the day of the game. That’s not true. We walked through the MGM Grand three hours after the game and the casino was packed.

Speaking of action, there will be plenty of it today at Churchill Downs’ betting windows.

Ryan O’Halloran

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