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Dan Daly: What’s the frequency? No Hooters allowed

- The Washington Times - Sunday, June 8, 2008

Did you see that Big Brown's jockey, Kent Desormeaux, was barred from wearing the Hooters logo on his pants - the restaurant chain is his newest sponsor - because it conflicted with one of the Belmont's sponsors?

What's next? The Bad News Bears can't wear uniforms that say "Chico's Bail Bonds"? Rocky Balboa can't enter the ring in a robe plugging "Shamrock Meats"?

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To give his Redskins broadcasts a boost, Dan Snyder has purchased WTEM, SportsTalk 980.

And if that doesn't increase the games' listenership, I'm told, Dan is prepared to make a bid for Radio Free Europe.

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Of course, once he owns it, it'll no longer be Free.

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It's all part of Snyder's plan to conquer the world ... and to get rid of all those leftover Brandon Lloyd jerseys.

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I've never seen an owner more obsessed with getting a "W" - WTEM, WTNT, W-this, W-that.

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And let's not forget www.redskins.com.

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Bills running back Marshawn Lynch is the "principal suspect," according to police, in a hit-and-run accident in Buffalo.

If so, then Lynch is going to be almost impossible to beat this year in the Yards After Contact category.

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So I'm reading about the Patriots' Nick Kaczur wearing a wire to help nail a purported drug dealer, and I'm thinking: Now something I never saw coming. I mean, after Spygate and now this, how much longer will it be before the words "Pats" and "night vision goggles" appear in the same story?

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In case Sen. Arlen Specter is looking for something else to investigate:

The death of Dwight White, erstwhile member of the "Steel Curtain," brings to 17 the number of former Steelers who have died since 2000 at the age of 59 or younger.

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Chuck Klosterman in Esquire, on Michael Vick, Rae Carruth and other footballers in prison:

"If we selected the 44 best football players in the U.S. penal system, how much [butt] would they kick? Right now, 2.3 million people are incarcerated. This is a social travesty. But - hypothetically - if we were to draft and train the best talent from that pool, I bet they could win the SEC or the Pac-10. They could maybe beat the Dolphins in an exhibition. ... These dudes would make the '77 Raiders look like Tibetan monks."

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In other football news, the NFL has issued the Cowboys' Pacman Jones a partial reinstatement.

Partial reinstatement - what exactly does that mean? That he can play cornerback, but he can't return kicks?

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Jones will be fully reinstated, the league says, if he remains on perfect behavior between now and Sept. 1. "Perfect behavior," in this instance, consists of staying out of further legal trouble, conducting himself appropriately on the field and not carrying anything smaller than a $5 bill.

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Maybe it's just me, but "Why don't American men do better in the French Open?" is beginning to sound an awful lot like "Why don't American men do better in sumo wrestling?"

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Heck, why don't American men do better in cricket ... or ski jumping? And don't get me started on field hockey ...

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Wish the Nationals had drafted University of Arizona southpaw Dan Schlereth - son of Mark, the second-generation Hog (and current ESPN talking head). Dan isn't nicknamed "Stink" like his dad, but he makes up for it, scouts say, with stuff in the mid-90s that's "just filthy."

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Alas, the Diamondbacks took him late in the first round, at No. 26 - which, if I'm not mistaken, is how many surgeries Mark had in his NFL career.

(Well, almost. Stink claims to have gone under the knife 29 times.)

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Mariners general manager Bill Bavasi is my new hero. After his team lost to the Angels on Wednesday, its 12th defeat in its last 15 games, he "ordered that food not be put out and that towels be withheld so that players would stand by their lockers for media interviews, instead of eating or showering," the Seattle Times reported.

That's right, Bill, starve 'em out of their slump.

He probably learned the ploy from "the Mahatma" - I'm just not sure which one, Branch Rickey or Gandhi.

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The reporters covering the club must have appreciated it, though. If there's anything more fun than interviewing a player after a loss, it's interviewing a hungry, sweaty player after a loss.

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Looking forward to the Baseball All-Star Game festivities, especially Kevin Youkilis in the Bat-Throwing Competition.

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It was Youkilis' dugout tirades, apparently, that caused the flare-up between him and Red Sox teammate Manny Ramirez the other day. That is, unless Youk just made the mistake of trying to clean Manny's helmet.

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ESPN's Chris Berman explaining why he doesn't read blogs (as quoted by the San Diego Union-Tribune): "I really am an Internet idiot. ... Look, criticism's been around since, I don't know, Julius Caesar. If they had blogs then, they would have been all over those guys."

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Elsewhere in sports, the Wisconsin Interscholastic Athletic Association is trying to push through a measure that prevents fans from going shirtless at indoor high school events. Let me guess: If the proposal goes through, violators will face stiff fines - but the money will be donated to the Community, uh, Chest.

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And finally ...

Only in Wisconsin, site of the celebrated "Ice Bowl" between the Packers and Cowboys, would they try to ban toplessness indoors but not outdoors.