King James escorted to the second round

Congratulations to the NBA.

It received the outcome it wanted in Tony Cheng’s neighborhood last night.

With LeBron James receiving hugs and kisses from the NBA earlier in the day, if not a bouquet of roses and a box of chocolates stamped with the Jerry West logo, the Cavaliers played with poise and confidence in defeating the Wizards 105-88 in Game 6.

This is one part of the marquee matchup the person behind the NBA curtain desperately wants: the Cavaliers vs. the Celtics in the second round.

This also set into motion what promises to be a long and possibly worrisome summer for the Wizards, what with the free agency of Gilbert Arenas, Antawn Jamison and Roger Mason Jr.

The game started to get away from the Wizards in the second quarter, when the Cavaliers closed on a 21-7 scoring run to take a 56-48 lead at halftime. Their advantage swelled to 79-64 after 36 minutes.

The Wizards never were able to mount a run, and their season ended in quiet fashion, as league officials would have scripted it.

With the suspension of Darius Songaila, league officials might as well allow James to play in the Popemobile.

Songaila had the temerity to pimp-slap the Persecuted One after they became entangled along the baseline in Game 5.

League officials apparently overlooked the tiny detail of James initiating the contact by putting the hand of Songaila in a vise-like hold with his arm and body. Songaila eventually wrested his hand from the potentially harmful grip, but not before accidentally pimp-slapping James.

James nearly fainted from the pain, while the referees assessed a technical foul to Songaila over the strenuous objections of Eddie Jordan.

With the support of the NBA, James now can drive to the basket and wave to his worshipers from the safety of his Popemobile. Anyone who dares to ignore the sanctity of the Popemobile would be expected to meet the same fate as Songaila.

The double standard that aids James is especially blatant if evaluated in the context of the vicious forearm he delivered to Andray Blatche’s jaw in Game 1.

James did not merely escape a suspension from the league. He did not even incur a foul from the referees. The league reviewed the incident and deemed it worthy of a flagrant foul, hardly a fitting punishment.

The NBA likes to pretend it does not understand why its goings-on inspire so many conspiracy theories.

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