- GOP hopes taking shutdown off the table with budget deal will pay dividends
- Chinese Death Star: The moon cited as the perfect launch pad for ballistic missiles
- Help wanted: Homeland Security plagued by vacancies at the top
- We are not amused: Queen’s protection officers warned to keep ‘sticky fingers’ off the royal cashews
- Unleash the crossbows: Gov. Scott Walker creates new hunting season
- Bubonic plague kills 20 in Madagascar
- G-20 diplomats fell for hacker attack promising nude photos of former French first lady Carla Bruni
- Minnesota guardsman charged with stealing private soldier data for fake IDs
- Florida appeals court rules universities can’t regulate guns
- Vladimir Putin defends Russian conservative values
CURL: You have been chosen to fix the Republican Party!
And final question, one for the ladies (woo!): “Do you believe our Party makes an effort to address issues of concern to women?” “Makes an effort”? How about “addresses the concerns of women?”
Sorry, Reince, but No. 1017.10163365 tossed your survey in the trash. Where it belonged.
Days later, though, I got another letter — chosen again! “SPECIAL NOTICE: You have been selected to represent voters in Virginia’s 5th Congressional District.” Sweet. “In your estimation, have the job-creation policies funded by the Obama administration in the past four years been successful or have they been excessively costly and wasteful boondoggles?”
Headed to the trash can again, I see one last question — and realize, this is the only question that should be on the survey, followed by an enormous blank space in which to expound. It’s 23 words: “Do you think that as a political party, Republicans need to assess their strategies and tactics to help turn out every voter possible?”
But I’d add 10 more words: “Please explain — Seriously, please! We haven’t a clue! Tell us!!!”
⦁ Joseph Curl covered the White House and politics for a decade for The Washington Times and is now editor of the Drudge Report. He can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org and on Twitter @josephcurl.
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