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All the cosmetic sorcery has done a real number on his eyes, leaving his right eye looking downright dead. The other looks propped open. His eyes are so weirdly messed up today, they make Bob Costas during the Sochi Olympics look like an eyeliner model.

“To say he looks Frankenstein-ian is not inaccurate,” a plastic surgeon told the Boston Herald last year. “Tell him we can fix him, if he wants to get in touch.”

That is a little hard on the monster in Frankenstein, I think. That manufactured creature was not gripped by vanity. If anything, Mary Shelley’s monster was a sad realist adrift in a romantic world.

Mr. Kerry is the opposite. He is a sad romantic adrift in a realist world, with American diplomacy at stake.

He travels the globe in search of the fantastical fountain of youth. Naivete and delusion are a dangerous combination when it comes to foreign policy.

And for leaders around the world, it is very difficult to take seriously a guy whose face appears to be sliding off his skull as he searches for unicorns.

Charles Hurt can be reached at and on Twitter @charleshurt.