'Your papers, please' must never be heard in America
Santa has kicked the habit in time for Christmas. No, not the sugar plum habit, or his fur-wearing habit, or his penchant for romping recklessly around open flame.
Santa needs to wear a seat belt. That's the new rule the chief elf must obey when he swoops into Hampton, N.H., this Christmas season. So say the cheerless Scrooges of Hampton. In today's regulation nation, even jolly old St. Nick can wind up on the naughty list.
So much for Santa Claus, who could turn up slim and gluten-free at any moment. A new version of the classic "A Visit from St. Nicholas" edits out all references to Mr. Claus' pipe smoking in the beloved old poem, rewritten by Pamela McColl, a writer and smoking-cessation advocate in Vancouver, Canada.
"There is a huge debate raging," McColl said of the attention. "I have been called every name in the book. One person said the only wreath they want to see this Christmas is one on my grave. Shame, shame, shame on you is the most common."
And she added to the cover: "Edited by Santa Claus for the benefit of children of the 21st century."
