OUT OF CONTEXT

Only at The Washington Times: Carleton Bryant humor targets politics, entertainment and latest breaking news.

• Foods that might kill libido

  By Carleton Bryant — Published October 15, 2009 Comments

  Eating certain foods can dampen sexual desire. So go ahead and blame your okra-rich diet.

• Arnold to Maria: Put down the cell phone

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 14, 2009 Comments

  California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has to give his wife a talking-to about driving with a cell phone in hand. He outlawed it in his "Anti-Girly Men" act.

• Marge Simpson bares all for Playboy

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 9, 2009 Comments

  Marge Simpson appears naked on the cover of Playboy magazine. Yeah, that Marge Simpson. The cartoon. You got a problem with that?

• Obama wins Nobel Peace Prize

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 9, 2009 Comments

  President Obama has won the Nobel Peace Prize. Even he said "for what?"

• NASA bombs the moon

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 9, 2009 Comments

  NASA has crashed two spacecraft into the moon. Authorities are questioning Lindsay Lohan and Amy Winehouse on DUI suspicions.

• Blueberries aid brain power

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 5, 2009 Comments

    A blueberry smoothie in the morning can help you think better in the afternoon. I could use a blueberry smoothie now ... or a beer.  

• French aghast over McDonald's at the Louvre

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 4, 2009 Comments

  McDonald's plans to open a restaurant at the Louvre. You know what they call a Quarter Pounder in France? A Royale with cheese.

• Obamas celebrate anniversary

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 4, 2009 Comments

  President Obama took his wife out to dinner to celebrate their 17th anniversary. Isn't it romantic? And secure?

• Scientists find mini-Stonehenge

  by Carleton Bryant — Published October 4, 2009 Comments

  Archeologists have found the site of a smaller version of Stonehenge about a mile from the original. Think of it as "Stonehenge Lite."

• WWE exec to run for U.S. Senate

  by Carleton Bryant — Published September 16, 2009 Comments

  The WWE's chief executive is running for the U.S. Senate from Connecticut. I hope Hulk Hogan joins the campaign. The election could use a some Hulkamania.

• Blueberry smoothies aid brain power

  by Carleton Bryant — Published September 11, 2009 Comments

  A blueberry smoothie in the morning can help you think better in the afternoon. I could use a blueberry smoothie now ... or a beer.

• Berlusconi says he's Italy's best ... prime minister

  by Carleton Bryant — Published September 11, 2009 Comments

  Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi says he's the best that Italy's ever had. Apparently, he doesn't know that Italy tells that to all of its prime ministers.

• Nicole Richie gives birth to Sparrow

  by Carleton Bryant — Published September 10, 2009 Comments

  Paris Hilton's former BFF has given birth to boy she has named Sparrow. That's going to look good on a driver's license.

• Study: Big thighs shrink heart disease risk

  by Carleton Bryant — Published September 4, 2009 Comments

  A new study shows that a good-sized thigh can reduce the risk of heart disease. Well, looks like I can cross heart disease off my list of worries.

• Report: Gadhafi to ask U.N. to abolish Switzerland

  by Carleton Bryant — Published September 4, 2009 Comments

  Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi is going to ask the U.N. to abolish Switzerland. Question: What about the chocolate?