Out of Context

Only at The Washington Times: Carleton Bryant humor targets politics, entertainment and latest breaking news.

• Foods that might kill libido

  Eating certain foods can dampen sexual desire. So go ahead and blame your okra-rich diet. Published October 15 2009 · Comment

• Arnold to Maria: Put down the cell phone

  California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has to give his wife a talking-to about driving with a cell phone in hand. He outlawed it in his "Anti-Girly Men" act. Published October 14 2009 · Comment

• Marge Simpson bares all for Playboy

  Marge Simpson appears naked on the cover of Playboy magazine. Yeah, that Marge Simpson. The cartoon. You got a problem with that? Published October 9 2009 · Comment

• Obama wins Nobel Peace Prize

  President Obama has won the Nobel Peace Prize. Even he said "for what?" Published October 9 2009 · Comment

• NASA bombs the moon

  NASA has crashed two spacecraft into the moon. Authorities are questioning Lindsay Lohan and Amy Winehouse on DUI suspicions. Published October 9 2009 · Comment

• Blueberries aid brain power

    A blueberry smoothie in the morning can help you think better in the afternoon. I could use a blueberry smoothie now ... or a beer.   Published October 5 2009 · Comment

• French aghast over McDonald’s at the Louvre

  McDonald's plans to open a restaurant at the Louvre. You know what they call a Quarter Pounder in France? A Royale with cheese. Published October 4 2009 · Comment

• Obamas celebrate anniversary

  President Obama took his wife out to dinner to celebrate their 17th anniversary. Isn't it romantic? And secure? Published October 4 2009 · Comment

• Scientists find mini-Stonehenge

  Archeologists have found the site of a smaller version of Stonehenge about a mile from the original. Think of it as "Stonehenge Lite." Published October 4 2009 · Comment

• WWE exec to run for U.S. Senate

  The WWE's chief executive is running for the U.S. Senate from Connecticut. I hope Hulk Hogan joins the campaign. The election could use a some Hulkamania. Published September 16 2009 · Comment

• Blueberry smoothies aid brain power

  A blueberry smoothie in the morning can help you think better in the afternoon. I could use a blueberry smoothie now ... or a beer. Published September 11 2009 · Comment

• Berlusconi says he’s Italy’s best … prime minister

  Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi says he's the best that Italy's ever had. Apparently, he doesn't know that Italy tells that to all of its prime ministers. Published September 11 2009 · Comment

• Nicole Richie gives birth to Sparrow

  Paris Hilton's former BFF has given birth to boy she has named Sparrow. That's going to look good on a driver's license. Published September 10 2009 · Comment

• Study: Big thighs shrink heart disease risk

  A new study shows that a good-sized thigh can reduce the risk of heart disease. Well, looks like I can cross heart disease off my list of worries. Published September 4 2009 · Comment

• Report: Gadhafi to ask U.N. to abolish Switzerland

  Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi is going to ask the U.N. to abolish Switzerland. Question: What about the chocolate? Published September 4 2009 · Comment