- The Washington Times - Friday, June 2, 2000

Easy 100 grand

Highlighting unanswered ethics questions Senate candidate first lady Hillary Rodham Clinton continues to avoid, the Coalition for a Better America announces it's holding a drawing for $1,000 in cattle futures.

The big test now is to see whether the winner can turn the $1,000 into $100,000.

Tax dollars at work

"In recognition of PRIDE month Salutaris," advises the memo at NIH, "the National Institutes of Health Gay and Lesbian Employees Forum is proud to announce our annual 'Noons-In-June' lecture series."

Perhaps the most intriguing lecture topic, to be presented at NIH's Lipsett Auditorium: "How to Avoid Sissyphobia."

Ike to ?

You never know where you'll bump into Charlie Brotman.

Go back to any inaugural parade since 1957 and find Mr. Brotman, the official president's announcer, informing newly sworn commanders in chief what bands or other surprises were marching up Pennsylvania Avenue.

That means advising presidents dating back to Dwight D. Eisenhower. In fact, Mr. Eisenhower personally offered the job to Mr. Brotman (who got his start as public-address announcer at the old Griffith Stadium) after he introduced Ike to throw out the first pitch for opening day of the 1956 baseball season.

"Opening day was against the New York Yankees, those damn Yankees," Mr. Brotman recalls. "I saw Mickey Mantle hit two homers over the center-field fence, one left-handed, one right-handed."

Thursday, we found the 72-year-old CEO of Brotman Communications busy organizing the 33rd Kemper Open golf tournament outside Washington. It's not his first time on the links.

"This is my 21st year," he says, "ever since the [PGA] tour came to Washington in 1980."

Come January's inaugural parade will we find him perched again next to the new president? "I'm planning on it," he says.

And who will he be announcing for? "I think it's [Vice President Al] Gore. Bush is a good man, but the incumbent will always get some of the advantage. It will be closer than people think."

Bill's beacon, cont.

Thanks to all our law enforcement officer readers who further briefed us on our item this week about Paul Abramson, of Berkeley, Calif., believing he was "aurally assaulted" while walking past the White House with his son.

Mr. Abramson contends that while walking past a group of protesters, "I felt like my ears were hurting inside," even though he had not heard any discernible loud noise.

He questioned whether some kind of "silent" microwave emission was being used to dissuade the protesters.

We're now told of several such devices that have been secretly used in the past by various governments and dictatorships around the world. Take the "Sonic Nausea" small electronic device, for sale from the Spy Mall catalog at www.spymall.com.

Barely larger than the 9-volt battery it stands on, it generates a unique combination of ultra-high-frequency sound waves that soon leads to queasiness for most in its vicinity.

"It can also cause headaches, intense irritation, sweating, imbalance, nausea, or even vomiting," says the catalog. "Use with discretion."

And if that's not enough to drive your protesters back to Berkeley, there's "Super Sonic Nausea."

"This 'industrial strength' version of the Sonic Nausea is now available for nongovernment sales for the first time," says the manufacturer. "Speeches, demonstrations, crowd dynamics this device has been used to 'influence' more of these in recent years than you might suspect."

Gray weekend

Eight years before his death in 1889, Jefferson Davis published "The Rise and Fall of the Confederate Government," a written defense against his critics, many of whom he eventually won over.

As for the remainder of his life, the former president of the Confederate States of America liked to spend his time attending Confederate reunions. Today, more than a hundred years later, those reunions continue, especially here in Washington. Recent participants included 97-year-old Sen. Strom Thurmond, South Carolina Republican, whose grandfather fought for the South.

In the U.S. Capitol's Statuary Hall at 11 a.m. Saturday, a commemoration of Jefferson Davis' birthday will be held, featuring guest speaker "Valor in Gray" author Greg S. Clemmer.

Then on Sunday at 3 p.m., just across the Potomac River in Arlington National Cemetery where Robert E. Lee made his home until the start of the Civil War annual Confederate memorial ceremonies will take place beneath the Arlington Confederate Monument.

The cemetery's largest monument, it shades no fewer than 500 Confederate soldiers buried in Jackson Circle.

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