- The Washington Times - Tuesday, December 18, 2001

Covert success
And how is the war against terrorism going? From an intelligence standpoint, better than expected, if not extremely well.
"I've been here doing oversight and we just had a long meeting, and we're doing much better than we ever had reason to believe," Select Intelligence Committee Chairman Rep. Porter J. Goss told Inside the Beltway yesterday. "Particularly given we were 'under-invested' in the intelligence community for so long."
The Florida Republican stressed that Americans are not privy to much of the war because it is being waged covertly, through intelligence channels.
"But we are definitely out and about, and very active around the world and in dozens of countries, literally making strong and steady progress against the international terrorist network," Mr. Goss said.
He added that U.S. intelligence agents have had a surprising amount of success "working with local talent," referring to foreign intelligence agencies that, prior to September 11, might not have shared information with the United States.
"We have cooperation from certain quarters that was not expected," said Mr. Goss. "People around the world were so horrified that they now take the international terrorist network seriously, realizing that what happened here in the United States could happen to them, too."

Patriot Day
We'd written two months ago that Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle and Senate Minority Leader Trent Lott designated September 11 as a national day of mourning and remembrance.
Mr. Daschle did not immediately attach an official name to the new day of remembrance, saying "every description has fallen short." At our invitation, Inside the Beltway readers in almost 50 states suggested names for September 11, including "Homeland Defense Day," "We the People Day," "Unity Day" and "Patriot Day," the latter getting the most votes.
We're pleased to report that the House and Senate have passed a resolution establishing September 11 as "Patriot Day."

God goes to school
The House of Representatives has passed a resolution expressing the sense of the Congress that public schools may display the words "God Bless America" as an expression of support for the nation during the war against terrorism.

Nuking your neighbor
Think twice before threatening to "nuke" your office or "anthrax" your boss.
A bill has been passed on Capitol Hill to create criminal and civil penalties "for whoever engages in conduct to convey false or misleading (yet reasonably believable) information concerning an activity that would constitute a violation of existing laws relating to: (1) biological-weapons attacks, (2) chemical-weapons attacks, (3) nuclear attacks, [or] (4) weapons of mass destruction."
Criminal penalties would include fines and/or imprisonment for up to 5 years and reimbursement to any party incurring expenses related to emergency or investigative response to the false reports.
Victims could also sue the pranksters for civil damages.

'Twas the Dubya
The moon shone down on the new-fallen snow
And lit up the valley with an ominous glow,
When what to my one good eye should appear,
But a dozen Apaches, and tanks in the rear,
And their leader, so fearless, his troops he did push,
I knew in an instant it must be George Bush.
More rapid than eagles his forces they came,
And they whistled, and shouted, and called out our names;
'Now Omar! Osama! Muhammad! Abdul!
'We come for you now; we've taken Kabul!
'To the top of the cliffs! To the back of their caves!
'When you chose this war, you dug your own graves!'
Author unknown

Beach terrorists
Harvard Law professor Alan Dershowitz says he enjoys getting naked at a "clothing optional" beach on Martha's Vineyard and defends his sandy frolics by claiming Eleanor Roosevelt jogged in the buff.
Carl Limbacher of NewsMax.com retrieved a tape of WABC radio's Richard Bey's interview Saturday with Peter Simon about his new book, "I and Eye: Pictures of My Generation," about how the 1960s changed American culture.
Mr. Dershowitz, a friend of Mr. Simon, phoned in to discuss the book.
"Alan, let's bring it back home," said Mr. Simon. "You and I both go to this wonderful nude beach on Martha's Vineyard. That never would have happened without the '60s."
At which point Mr. Bey noted his listeners were no doubt screaming and pulling their hair out at the thought of Alan Dershowitz running on the beach nude.
Responded Mr. Dershowitz: "You know, Eleanor Roosevelt used to run naked on that nude beach."

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