- The Washington Times - Tuesday, June 26, 2001

Starr power
Former Whitewater independent counsel Kenneth W. Starr is back in the political spotlight, lending his name to the top 100 conservative candidates for Congress as the special guest this evening of the National Conservative Campaign Fund's 2001 Chairman's Reception in McLean.
The NCCF's goals are to help re-elect "endangered conservative incumbents" and provide maximum contributions allowable to candidates challenging "liberal" incumbents.
A solicitor general for four years under President George Bush, Mr. Starr, who's been busy of late on the lecture circuit, is a partner with Kirkland & Ellis in Washington.

Cookie recall
Uncle Sam's cookies are invading your privacy.
That's right, the browsing habits and behavior of Americans who log onto the Web sites of some two dozen federal government agencies are being tracked through unauthorized files known as "cookies" — despite privacy policies forbidding it.
The Senate Committee on Government Affairs, through probes by 51 inspectors general, sniffs out "300 persistent cookies" on the Web sites of 23 federal agencies, with a total of 27 agencies in clear violation of their own privacy policies.
Worse yet, the numerous violations "represent just the tip of the iceberg," the committee's ranking committee member, Sen. Fred Thompson, Tennessee Republican, tells us.
For instance, of the 206 State Department Web sites examined, 116 were found in violation. At the Commerce Department, an even dozen cookies are in place. There were two at Agriculture, five at the Environmental Protection Agency, three at the Federal Emergency Management Agency, six at Health and Human Services, 18 at Interior, two at the National Endowment for the Humanities, one at the Office of Personnel Management, and 29 at Veterans Affairs.

Where de ribber?
Former President Jimmy Carter now reveals he spoke two languages while growing up in rural Georgia, one "heavily influenced by my playmates' African heritage, with special pronunciation and inflection."
"In our house and at school and church, we were drilled in the proper use of white folks' language, but even the best efforts were not always enough," the nation's 39th president writes for American Legacy, a magazine that celebrates black history and culture.
When speaking his black dialect, Mr. Carter says a ghost is a "haint," eaten is "et," going is "gwine," rode is "rid," himself is "hisself," saw is "seen," am is "be," yesterday is "yestiddy" with the accent on the middle syllable, rinse is "rench," help is "holp," and he says he didn't bother with final r's, g's, or d's on other common words.
"Sometimes, even Mama couldn't understand what our black neighbors were saying, and I was proud to interpret," Mr. Carter writes. "I made my share of mistakes when trying to shift between the two dialects. Mama teased me for years for rushing into the house … and reporting to my parents, 'I rid in the wagon and driv the mules!'
"Once, Daddy took the family 30 miles to the east to see the flooding Flint River. Never having seen a large stream, I asked, 'Wheh de ribber, Daddy? Is it down in dat creek?'"
Mr. Carter says he remembers being chastised by his English teacher once when for "food," he used the word "t'eat," which he presumed was a contraction of "to eat."
"Sulking, I found the word in the classroom dictionary, and raised my hand to inform the teacher of her mistake," he recalls. "She smiled, and asked me to read the definition. I glanced at it and tried to back out of the confrontation, but she insisted that I read aloud: 'The mammary protuberance on a female's anatomy, through which milk is discharged to a baby or young animal.' I had always thought this was a 'tit.'"

Name that bill
Jim Wrenn, Richmond-based author of the PoliSat Limerick, tells Inside the Beltway his latest rhyme scheme was inspired by Republican Sen. John McCain's "petty insistence" that interviewers refer to the patients' bill of rights as the "McCain-Edwards-Kennedy Bill," rather than the "Kennedy-Edwards-McCain Bill" or "Kennedy-McCain Bill" or the "Kennedy Bill supported by McCain."
McCain was a hero, no doubt,
but now he craves law-naming clout
with laws having names
that start with McCain
and gripes when his name is left out.

The health bill proposal he claims
is his 'cause it starts with his name —
implying a gesture
by Kennedy-Edwards
to throw their support to McCain.

But that bill's true nature is feigned
by starting its name with McCain.
The 'Straight Talk Express'
declines to confess
it's Ted's bill endorsed by McCain.

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