- The Washington Times - Monday, September 3, 2001

Future Teddys

Yes, that's a swimsuit model on the invitation to the Young Democrats of Montgomery County "End of Summer Blowout" at the Shark Club of Bethesda.

"You're invited … to mingle, dance and discover the Democratic way to party," the invitation reads, encouraging Democrats to stick around the club and witness the evening's "Venus Swimsuit Model Search."

Future Bailey

Earlier this summer, we started to write that 58-year-old Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison, Texas Republican, was adopting a 1-month-old baby girl.

But because the adoption process is a very private one for all parties involved, and since this particular adoption was months from being final, Mrs. Hutchison and her husband, Ray, asked that we refrain from any coverage.

Last Friday, a fax arrived from the senator, "intended as an expression of our sincere thanks to you for permitting the adoption of our wonderful daughter, Kathryn Bailey Hutchison, to become final in Dallas today without press attention, and, as we promised, to advise you when that exciting event occurred. …

"Bailey, named for her mother and grandmother, has been with us in Dallas since late May. … We have, for many years, been trying to add to our wonderful family, and this is truly a dream come true."

And how is a busy senator, with two grown stepdaughters, handling a baby in the house?

"It's what every working mother goes through, juggling time and hours," a close friend of Mrs. Hutchison's tells us.

Not Hoover's FBI

Washington author Adrian Havill, who brought us an unauthorized biography of Jack Kent Cooke, the backgrounds of Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein, and the life and crimes of Hadden Clark, to name but a few of his best sellers, has finished a biography of FBI double agent Robert P. Hanssen, the most notorious modern-day American spy.

St. Martin's Press will publish "The Spy Who Stayed Out in the Cold" on Oct. 19, barely eight months after federal agents surrounded Hanssen while he was attempting to complete an exchange with his Russian handlers in a Virginia park.

Mr. Havill, a frequent contributor to this column, says he conducted more than 100 interviews with Hanssen's family members, friends, FBI colleagues and confidential sources, and promises to take readers into Hanssen's mind (where the FBI should have been during the 16 years its "exemplary" agent was able to collect cut diamonds, Rolex watches and more than $1.4 million from his Russian contacts).

"Louis Freeh, who had followed Bob Hanssen to the altar of Saint Catherine's for Communion on many a Sunday was gone, and not in glory," Mr. Havill writes of the recently departed FBI director.

"He left the bureau in turmoil, an uncoordinated maze of fiefdoms where half of the agents had fewer than six years of experience and employees were quitting as soon as they could find the exit sign.

"What was once the nation's most exemplary government organization," notes the author, "was now considered a bureaucracy with more holes in it than the once proud G-men had pumped into John Dillinger's body."

(Tomorrow: Robert Hanssen, dental student)

Try Raid

Epidemiologists in central Kazakhstan's Karaganda region believe dangerous mutant spiders are emerging as a result of "global warming."

The Cooler Heads Coalition in Washington, which doesn't buy into the global warming theory, intercepted an Interfax dispatch from the former Soviet republic reporting the spiders recently attacked eight persons, causing high fever, back pain and kidney disorders.

"The spiders caught are different from the conventional ones in shape and color," the dispatch says. "The appearance of the mutants may be connected with global warming."

Kazakhstan, which borders on the Caspian Sea, is in a position to be one of the 21st century's major sources of oil, on which it will depend for prosperity.

Lion kings

Speaking of emerging Jurassic Parks, if you thought President Bush and Democratic Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle were rulers of Washington, think again.

The Smithsonian reports that schoolteacher Debbie Brown hosted a group of youngsters for an overnight stay at the National Zoo, promising the children they would have no problem awaking in the morning.

The zoo's lions, she explained, "start roaring around 6 a.m., muted at first from inside and then louder when the keepers let them out. Lions re-establish their territory by roaring."

Ode to Labor Day

See the Union Bosses on parade

Nasty people chiefly

Someone must have liked them once

But I'm afraid quite briefly

David Denholm, president of the Public Service Research Center in Washington.

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