- The Washington Times - Friday, August 2, 2002

The Olympic pinheads profess to be shocked by the news that a reputed Russian crime boss has been charged with fixing two figure skating events at the Salt Lake City Winter Games.

These are the same poor souls who will be shocked by the next act of terror on these shores. These are the same poor souls who ask, "Why do they hate us so?"

The Olympic Games never have been as genuine as the fat cats would have you believe. The Games never have been as clean or as politically neutral as advertised. The white doves have never saved lives or fostered goodwill among nations. The white doves are just props, like the rings, heavy-handed symbols that aim to distract while one of the IOC whores lifts your wallet.

We now know that the androgynous-looking women from the old East German police state have health problems from their years as dirty athletes. We now know the old Soviet Union also enslaved its athletes in the name of the motherland. We now know not to trust the Chinese, especially their women swimmers.

We can't forget Ben Johnson, the Canadian sprinter who to this day can't seem to figure out what went wrong. We can't forget the celebrated American woman who resorted to pancake makeup to hide what appeared to be the markings of a closely shaved mustache. We can't forget Ireland's Michelle Smith, the talk of the Atlanta Games who eventually confirmed the talk. We can't forget the glut of no-name athletes who flunked this or that newfangled test. Mostly, we can't forget Juan Antonio Samaranch, the former IOC president whose stewardship set the outlaw tone.

The evidence goes on and on, with one scandal overtaking another, until the ugly whole of the Olympic Games has emerged.

Yet shock is being expressed following the reports that the figure skating competition possibly was compromised.

This is too funny, too much. Where's the laugh track? Stop. You're killing everyone.

It would be shocking to learn that the figure skating competition possibly was clean.

The shocked ones must have missed the matter of French judge Marie-Reine Le Gougne.

She was a piece of work, in a lather, so fragile and delicate, so alone. What could she do? They made her vote for the Russians. They might have broken her legs if she had voted for the Canadians. And you know the French. They roll over with the first threat.

If Osama bin Laden had taken down the Eiffel Tower, they would have sought a meeting with the nut job. They would have wanted to negotiate a settlement. They would have expressed this pathological need to understand, not unlike Phil Donahue, who, unfortunately, is polluting the American environment again with his smug sensitivity.

The IOC and skating federation seemingly fixed the Russian-Canadian scandal last February. Just to make it go away, they passed out gold medals to the two Canadian skaters, Jamie Sale and David Pelletier. They would have passed out a gold medal to your family dog just to get back to the business of counting the receipts from Visa, one of the important official sponsors.

Now back to the federal investigation and the mug shot of this puffy-faced Russian guy. Yes. It is shocking. So shocking. It is shocking that an event in the rotten-to-the-core Olympic Games possibly was rigged.

Perhaps it depends on how you define shocking.

Some people might be shocked to read of one drug dealer rubbing out another drug dealer. Others just assume that is what drug dealers do.

Death goes with the drug-dealing profession, the same as scamming goes with the Olympic Games.

All the principals, in one form or another, have been shown to be in on the scam: the athletes, the host cities, the judges, the referees and the IOC whores.

There has been so much wrongdoing by so many, you don't know which parties to trust. Is tiddlywinks an Olympic sport yet? Maybe you can trust these performers, although they could be taking some banned substance that steadies their nerves.

The judging in figure skating is hard to fathom on its best days. It is like trying to discern why someone orders chocolate ice cream instead of strawberry at the store. Both flavors look good sitting in the container, but only one is chosen.

Figure skating is where the men in peacock suits cry, the women claw one another behind their pasted smiles, and the judges scratch the backs of each other.

The competition is usually worth a couple of laughs. Only the hopelessly devoted believe in the purity of the outcomes, which is fine. The same dynamic applies to Vince McMahon's professional wrestlers. Both endeavors can entertain, despite the "Wizard of Oz" feel about them.

The phony Olympic ideals were exposed a long time ago, and now the Games are the playthings of the rich and self-important. The Games have no real reason for being other than money and ego.

The outrage inevitably subsides, because the IOC whores only scurry out from under their rocks every other two years, and when they do, they declare themselves reformed, all better. They count on short memories and the absence of principles from their suitors.

A few sad-sack rich folks and politicians in these parts are offering up Washington to be a sucker in 2012. This is so they can confirm their importance to one another during one of their oh-so-exclusive cocktail parties in Georgetown. Most people grow out of the high school prom scene. A few stay stuck there, forever trapped in the who's-who game and the peer pressure that goes with it.

You can see how it might be tough on a person's self-esteem. Are you A-list or B-list material? It is just too bad that the gray-haired, pot-bellied high schoolers are trying to inflict their nonsense on us, the masses, in 2012.

Tell you what: How about if we all agree to a time and meeting place and promise to curtsy in front of the sagging, drooping power brokers in town? Would that help? Would they then agree to withdraw Washington as a candidate to host the 2012 Summer Games? Just asking.

The Russian guy will be out of the news soon enough, and the International Skating Union will promise to conduct a thorough investigation, and before long, it will be business as usual until the next scandal.

Then, as always, people will insist they are shocked by it.

How could this happen? How can this be? Oh, my. Boo-hoo. This is an attack on the Games themselves. This is not just some pathetic revelation involving the IOC whores. This undermines the essence of the games.

Right. Tell us a new one. Didn't the shelf life of that line expire with Johnson's gold medal in 1988?

The IOC whores know better. They know everybody will be back for more.

Washington in 2012?

The champagne is on ice.

Who knows what's genuine? Who cares?

It is all about the self-gratification of a few, the white doves and the official sponsors.

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