- The Washington Times - Wednesday, August 28, 2002

Washington failed to pass the contrived inspection from the U.S. Olympic Committee yesterday.
The cheer that followed was a hip, hip, hooray.
Baltimore was absolved as well, with a hyphen, to be geographically correct.
The bad joke involves New York and San Francisco, the so-called domestic winners in the contest to host the burdensome insult of the 2012 Summer Games. They have Washington's condolences. A loss qualifies as a victory with this waste matter.
Are you ready for some fleet/match race keelboat open (soling) mixed sailing?
That is just one of the problems.
You can't comprehend most of the events without pages of explanations and a glossary.
The official Web site of the Olympic movement is an incriminating source of information, starting with the movement. It is mostly a movement to fleece another city. The correct word is addiction, the Olympic addiction.
Fortunately, if it matters to the two U.S. victims, there is no shortage of international enablers. London, Paris, Rome and Moscow are said to be among those knocking on the 2012 door as well. That is their problem now. There is joy in Tony Cheng's neighborhood, the playpen on East Capitol and the town formerly known as Raljon.
Washington has been exonerated from donating its time, money and army of volunteers. Sympathy goes to the latter. The volunteer is the official dupe of the Olympic Games, roused into action by the tattered company line and the notion of civic pride.
There is nothing prideful about contributing to the welfare of the IOC whores. The IOC whores give the genuine painted women of the night a bad name. The IOC whores provide a city with a hopelessly unentertaining mess in exchange for first-rate hotel accommodations, limousine service and a secret bank account.
All too many IOC whores have a bad attitude, an anti-American bent and a pathological sense of entitlement. They did not even bother to thank Atlanta in 1996, the last time the summer fraud was perpetrated on U.S. soil.
The fleet/match race keelboat open (soling) mixed sailing competition is the least of it, and not to delve into all 35 medal sports and the nearly 400 events, summer and winter. The IOC has left the fall and spring out of it so far, both pleasant times of the year in these parts.
The participants in the canoe/kayak slalom competition, involving the K1, C1 and C2 in a variety of 300-meter tests, aspire not to drown. You can watch this activity most days at Great Falls. Your wallet won't be lightened, and your bags and body cavities won't be searched either.
It is not nice in the new millennium to point out the obvious. You could ask Richard Reid, the shoe bomber who is unswayed by the IOC-approved white doves. Never mind that he looks like a nut, and he walks like a nut in his fuse-adorned shoes. His free pass came from the family of thought that allows the IOC to flourish.
Tiddlywinks is a game whose relevance is bound to be acknowledged by the IOC one of these years, so long as the proper inducements are made.
There is no end to the IOC's funny business, as the latest scandal involving figure skating indicates. The failure was institutional, the institution as corrupt as ever.
The IOC has trained the bidding cities and the international press to look the other way. To be fair, the American press usually voices a weak objection before producing a plethora of special Olympic sections, crammed with everything the public never cared to know. The reward, pathetic as it is, is possibly a journalistic prize at the end of the year.
Washington's movers and shakers are disappointed today, though ever convinced of their cause. The convincing requires a large blind spot, an unchecked ego and an absence of standards.
"We put forth a great bid and we can hold our heads high," said Dan Knise, president of Washington DC 2012.
Those heads have been spared a massive headache.
It is funny how it works. You would not patronize a company whose business practices were less than honorable. Yet the IOC is absolved of that elementary standard. Incredibly enough, there is an actually a list of patrons pleading to be the IOC's chosen one in 2012. They are down on their knees, with hands clasped.
At least Washington and Baltimore can return to their previously scheduled business.
Let's hear it one more time. Hip, hip, hooray.

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