- The Washington Times - Sunday, October 27, 2002

If there's one thing this World Series has shown, it's that the Angels really miss Tony Danza, who pitched them to their last title in "Angels in the Outfield."

That David Eckstein is really something, isn't he? Anaheim, I hear, wasn't going to claim him off waivers a couple of years ago until he assured the club he was pre-shrunk.

Trivia question: The Giants last won the World Series in 1954, when they were still in New York. Who was the final batter in that Series, and what other famous last out did he make in his career? (Answer below.)

I'm not sure how serious Lou Piniella is about managing anymore, now that he's down in sunny Florida. He signed his contract with the Devil Rays as "Lou Quinella."

So I'm reading about the Expos possibly playing some games in Puerto Rico next season, and I'm thinking: Hey, why not the Dominican Republic? It'll make the players feel years younger. (At least, that's the effect it had on Bartolo Colon, Ramon Ortiz and Rafael Furcal, to name just three.)

Had a horrifying dream the other night: The Nebraska Cornhuskers were 5-3 and absent from the Associated Press poll for the first time since '81, but they were still second in the BCS rankings.

Let me get this straight: Maryland's football game at North Carolina next Saturday isn't going to be televised locally? Ralph Friedgen's team deserves better.

From the wonderfully warped mind of George Carlin:
"If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the 'Jags' and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the 'Bucs,' what does that make the Tennessee Titans?"

News item: In an upcoming interview on HBO's "Real Sports," former NFL defensive lineman Esera Tuaolo will reveal he's gay.
Instead of weighing in on the subject myself, I'm going to let others do it.
Ben Gay (RB, Browns, 2001): "What's he talkin' about? I'm Gay!"
William Gay (DL, Lions/Vikings, 1978-88): "No, I'm Gay!"
Blenda Gay (DE, Chargers/Eagles, 1974-76): "No, I'm Spartacus! I mean, I'm Gay!"

I'm not sure how this fits in, but in Lake Oswego, Ore., eight boys have joined the depleted high school cheerleading squad. "It turned out to be pretty fun," one of them told the AP. "You're basically lifting weights, but with girls."
That's why they call it a hernia.

This week Tre Johnson, next week Moe Elewonibi?

Here's my take on the Jon Jansen negotiations: Jansen is waiting to see if Dan the Man is going to offer him something ridiculous as he's been known to do in these situations. If the Redskins owner does, Jansen will probably re-sign. If not, he'll dive enthusiastically into free agent waters.

Brian Mitchell, bless him, is still stirring things up in Philadelphia. His charge that Warren Sapp spit on him during Sunday's game brought this response from the Bucs defensive tackle (as quoted by the Tampa Tribune):
"The man I loved more than anyone [former coach Tony Dungy] said he's a punk. Brian Mitchell's a punk. He doesn't play with sportsmanship. Come on. I've been in this league a long time. I may say some crazy things, but I've never done anything dirty."

Attention collectors: The 8-by-10 glossy color photo of Dan Snyder being offered by EBay autographed and including a certificate of authenticity is available only a few more hours. Current bid: $4.99.

Note: There's a $3 charge for shipping and handling.

Answer to trivia question: The Indians' Dale Mitchell, pinch-hitting for left fielder Dave Pope, made the last out in the '54 World Series. (He fouled to Giants third baseman Hank Thompson.) Two years later in the Series, Mitchell was the last batter to go down in Don Larsen's perfect game. (That time he was pinch-hitting for hard-luck loser Sal Maglie and got called out on strikes.)

One more Carlin gem:
"Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?"

In honor of Charles Moose, intrepid police chief of Montgomery County, the Sunday Column brings you Memorable Moose in Sports History:
John "Moose" Clabaugh Swatted 62 homers for Tyler in the East Texas League in 1926. Alas, he had only a sip of coffee in the majors (14 games with Brooklyn at the end of that season). Minor league totals (1923-40): 346 dingers, .339 average.
Edward "Moose" Krause All-American in basketball and second team All-American in football at Notre Dame in the early '30s. Member of the Basketball Hall of Fame.
Bill "Moose" Skowron All-Star first baseman who hit .300 five times for the Yankees in the '50s and '60s. Spent the first half of '64 with the Senators before being traded to the White Sox, along with pitcher Carl Bouldin, for first baseman Joe Cunningham and pitcher Frank Kreutzer. Major league totals (1954-67): 211 home runs, .282 average.
Bullwinkle J. Moose Football legend at Whatsamatta U. (No stats available.)
Bob Moose Pirates pitcher who threw a no-hitter against the Mets in September 1969, the season the Amazins' went All the Way. Three years later, he uncorked the wild pitch that brought home the winning run for the Reds in the deciding game of the NLCS. Major league totals (1967-76): 76-71 record, 3.50 ERA.
Daryl "Moose" Johnston Pro Bowl blocking back for the Cowboys' Emmitt Smith in the '90s. Rushed for less than 1,000 yards in his career, but did catch 294 passes.
Mike "Moose" Mussina Orioles/Yankees right-hander with a 182-102 record, five Gold Gloves but, curiously, no Cy Youngs or 20-victory seasons.
Manitoba Moose American Hockey League entry, based in Winnipeg and affiliated with the Vancouver Canucks. Currently in third place in the Canadian Division of the Eastern Conference.

Other Moose minutiae:
Bob Moose is the only player in NFL, NBA, NHL or major league baseball history whose last name was Moose (according to various encyclopedias in my possession).
Toward the end of his career, "Moose" Clabaugh spent a season in Baltimore with the then-minor league Orioles (1933). Also on the club was Julius "Moose" Solters, who led the International League with a .363 average and 147 RBI. Imagine, two players nicknamed "Moose" on one team! (And Solters, like Clabaugh, played the outfield!)
Only a couple of guys on the Moose List were very Moose-ish (by today's standards, anyway) "Moose" Krause, who measured 6-3, 220, and "Moose" Johnston, who went 6-2, 242. "Moose" Skowron was a mere 5-11, 195; but then, his nickname was actually an abbreviated version of Mussolini, which his grandfather jokingly called him as a kid.

And finally, always remember, Chief: They're not booing you, they're just saying, "Mooooose."

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