- The Washington Times - Friday, January 28, 2005

Nobles: Bobby and Gloria Doster, for dispatching a pair of punks with extreme prejudice.

Two gunmen chose the wrong country store to rob on Monday. When they entered the Doster’s Shoats Grocery & Package near Crawford, Ga., a well-known place that attracts a local clientele, they probably expected an easy take. How could they have known that the Dosters, both over 50 years old, would put up a fight?

One of the gunmen immediately grabbed Mrs. Doster, while the other pointed his gun at her husband, reports the Associated Press. The man holding Mrs. Doster pushed her toward the register and ordered her to open it. When she wasn’t moving fast enough, the gunman holding Mr. Doster tried to shoot him, but his shot went astray and his gun jammed. It was the split second that Mr. Doster needed. He pulled out his .380-caliber handgun and shot one of the suspects.

Meanwhile, Mrs. Doster dove for the 9mm pistol she kept near the register and began firing. “I just started shooting,” she said. “I was trying to blow his brains out is what I was trying to do.”

By the time the police arrived, just five minutes later, both gunmen were down and pronounced dead on the scene. According to the officials, the Dosters were acting in self-defense and won’t be charged.

For proving once again that guns in the hands of the law-abiding promotes the public welfare, the Dosters are the Nobles of the week.

Knaves: The University of Colorado at Boulder, for employing a fascist.

At first glance, the things that CU-Boulder professor Ward Churchill, chairman of the Ethnic Studies Department, wrote in an essay on September 11 demand the Knave of the week honor. Among other things, he called the victims “little Eichmanns,” referring to Adolph Eichmann, Hitler’s right-hand man. Then again, Mr. Churchill has been saying these things, and much worse (“more 9/11s might be necessary”), for years. To call out every quack with a word processor isn’t worth the time.

CU-Boulder, however, should be ashamed of itself. Mr. Churchill’s all-consuming obsession is that the United States reflects Hitler’s Germany, and therefore must be destroyed. Yet, it’s Mr. Churchill who applauds mass murder, sanctions terrorism and wants to “reorder” the nation’s consciousness (perhaps via concentration camps, eh, Mr. Churchill?). Amazingly (or not), Mr. Churchill doesn’t notice the irony. In fact, there are several layers of irony he doesn’t notice. And CU-Boulder gives this guy money — taxpayer money — to teach several hundred students every semester?

Fortunately, students at Hamilton College in New York have protested Mr. Churchill’s presence at a panel discussion on Feb. 3.

For employing an “Eichmann” of their own, CU-Boulder is the Knave of the week.

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