Rapper-actor Eminem announced this week that, no, he’s not retiring, merely “taking a break.” Playing coy about his “next move,” Em said only that his plans include producing albums for other artists. If that doesn’t keep him busy, here are a few suggestions:
Renovate the United Nations Real estate mogul and TV star Donald Trump suggested during congressional testimony that all manner of crooks and incompetents will bid on the U.N. contract to renovate its Manhattan headquarters. So why not a rapper?
—Train for the Tour de France — Bionic cyclist Lance Armsrong won his seventh and final Tour de France. (Unlike Em, he says he truly is retiring). Next year’s field is wide open.
8 Mile, the karaoke video game — Eminem’s autobiographical movie about a Detroit rapper rising through the ranks of the ‘hood won critical raves. With “The Godfather” having been turned into a click-and-shoot video diversion, we’re thinking we’ve got a very lucrative crossover here.
Propose to Jennifer Lopez— Yes, yes, J-Lo’s already married. We know. But it can’t last long, and Her Highness could stand to have someone on deck.
Write a book —e advances are good for celebrities, and if you don’t turn in any product, you can always, like Sean Connery, return the cashcq. Or you could write a windy autobio, call it “My Life,” and make millions.