Wednesday, September 6, 2006

The highly anticipated “Million Illegal Alien March” graces the streets around the Mall today in order to impress the windbags on Capitol Hill and nudge the amnesty movement forward.

Their plea is a strong one because of lawmakers who do not want to alienate the vote of illegal-alien sympathizers, both the cultural kin of the illegal aliens and the dimwitted crowd that dismisses a sovereign nation’s laws because of a higher morality.

Their bout of enlightenment is amusing, because the dimwits would feel especially put out if you elected not to be civil around them. They would take that as a threat to their well-being and no doubt equip themselves with a team of lawyers bent on unearthing obscure code violations. They would want to see you prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, absurd as that is, given the source.

The dimwits certainly believe in the sanctity of private property and would be absolutely distraught if someone stole their automobile. There are laws against the heisting of automobiles, of course, but shouldn’t we all be allowed to ignore a law or two, if only to be accorded the same latitude as illegal aliens? Then again, if each American were allowed to choose a law to flout, anarchy possibly would be the result. Not that there is anything wrong with anarchy in these times of cultural equivalence. At least then you could dismiss your property assessment and the unarmed ones in the bluest precincts would be the first ones lined up against the wall.

We need to be consistent with our immigration policy, if policy is the right word.

If we are too impotent to handle the illegal alien issue — and we are — we might as well open our doors to everyone. That is not a policy either. But at least it is consistent.

Hispanics should not be the only group to have all the illegal fun.

Life is not fair, although too many Americans are under the misguided impression that they can make it fair.

The growing acceptance of illegal aliens is not fair to the legal immigrants who filled out all the paperwork and waited forever before receiving a tap on the shoulder from Uncle Sam. These chumps should have just done it the old illegal-alien way and then held a massive rally.

The illegal-alien sympathizers inevitably play the race card whenever someone questions the rewarding of those whose first act in this country was a lawbreaking one. The playing of the race card apparently reveals a highly evolved intellect, not unlike the playing of the Hitler card.

Strange as it is, Hitler has become the go-to guy of the far left in the new millennium.

As blue as this city is, its leaders ought to implement an Adopt an Illegal Alien program. That would satisfy all the diversity requirements in the Wonder Bread neighborhoods of Ward 3, where the concept of diversity rarely extends beyond the Hispanic landscaper, maid, painter and nanny.

Organizers of the event are urging marchers to carry the American flag, as opposed to the flags of their native countries, which gave onlookers the wrong idea during the previous illegal-alien go-around last spring.

The marchers are seeking absolution for the illegal aliens, plus looking to stop the Neanderthal practice of arresting those who enter our country illegally.

This sounds incredibly reasonable, assuming we take this thinking to its proper end and become a land mass without borders.

Now if only the marchers could pass along their sophistication to the airport gropers looking for combustible gels.

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