Blatant theft and fuzzy timetables

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Jerry Stackhouse has decided to collect his millions from the bench, preferably where no one will notice the larcenous air about him.

He lacked the conscience to notify the general manager and coach of his intentions, the pathology associated with bank robbers and the like, fittingly enough.

Stackhouse is stealing money this season, starting with the decision to remedy his right knee with rest instead of surgery last summer. The rest led to surgery in October, just in time for Stackhouse to miss the first 45 games of the season.

That was the first insult from the two-time All-Star. The second was his insistence to add a hint of mystery to the mundane, seemingly breaking out in a rash with each mention of a timetable.

If the purpose was to add a modicum of drama to the rehabilitation process, Stackhouse neglected to calculate the appearance of being self-absorbed. He could have at least pretended to be eager to rejoin his teammates.

His shutdown following the team's game with the Lakers last weekend was made in the spirit of vapidity as well.

He is not where he wants to be on the court, and disinclined to push through it. He might as well have threatened to take the team's ball home with him while he was storing away his short pants.

It was left to Ernie Grunfeld and Eddie Jordan to remind Stackhouse that he is an employee of the Wizards, with certain obligations and responsibilities to the team, foreign as that concept may be to one who has shown he even has trouble comprehending a rental-lease agreement at the beach.

The fine print of a checkout date is another form of a timetable, not one of Stackhouse's strengths, as it is turning out.