First pitches frequently wind up imperfect

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The sky was dark, the air damp. District Mayor Anthony Williams stood halfway between the mound and home plate at RFK Stadium, baseball in hand.

Landing a team? That was the easy part.

To say that Williams throws like a girl would be a gross understatement — and an insult to high school softball. The man counts votes, not balls and strikes.

Still, he was the obvious choice to toss a ceremonial first pitch to Washington Nationals infielder Jamey Carroll before the team’s April 3 exhibition finale.

“He moved up and got it there,” Carroll recalls. “Good enough. It was better than the one I caught in spring training, when the guy threw it in the dirt and I took it off the shin.”

After his throw, Williams raised his arms in triumph. He had reason to preen: In the long, distinguished history of ceremonial first pitches, his short, undistinguished flutterball qualified as a towering achievement. Mostly because the ball reached home plate.

The same can’t be said for John Kerry, who last year came up short in both the presidential election and with a feeble toss at Boston’s Fenway Park. Ditto for Ronald Reagan, whose high-and-way, 1986 fling at Baltimore’s Memorial Stadium could have downed an incoming Soviet ICBM.

As for the real, live elephant once trotted out by the Oakland A’s — The animal simply — and perhaps smartly — dropped the ball on the mound.

“I’ve caught quite a few [first pitches],” says Nationals backup catcher Gary Bennett. “I recommend wearing a cup.”

Of course, none of this is meant to dissuade President Bush from throwing out the historic first pitch at tonight’s Nationals home opener. By all means, bring it on. But be warned: RFK Stadium ain’t the White House T-Ball field. There are easier ways for the leader of the free world to spend a spring evening.

Selling Democrats on Social Security reform, for instance.

“I always expect a bad throw,” Nationals manager Frank Robinson says of ceremonial tosses. “You’re surprised when it’s not.”

Presidential pitches

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