Singh wields sharpest needle on PGA Tour

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Vijay Singh, professional golf's perceived Darth Vader, giggles like a schoolgirl at the revelation -- his high-pitched laughter almost as surprising as the news he has just received: His peers have tabbed him in a landslide as the PGA Tour's top needler, golf's Duke of Dig.

"Oh, it's not like that, is it, Paulie?" Singh says, turning to his caddie, Paul Tesori. "I don't give guys any cheek, do I?"

Tesori simply rolls his eyes and says, "Oh, you know you do. I can't believe you're trying to deny it. You love it."

The three-time major champion throws his head back and emits another round of hyena-like peals of laughter.

"I didn't know it was like that, that so many guys would pick me," Singh says while studying a survey that shows that he received votes from 13 of the 50 players polled and finished nearly 40 percent ahead of runner-up rip artist Jeff Sluman (eight votes). "I don't know if that's flattering or not, but I guess it's who I am, bro. I just like joking with the guys."

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No sport lends itself to good-natured ribbing like golf. The game's leisurely pace practically demands conversation between competitors and provides massive windows of opportunity for gamesmanship and witty repartee. Any member of a regular weekend foursome can attest to the sport's high smart-aleck quotient.

The nature of life on tour unquestionably encourages the needler within. In some respects, the PGA Tour is little more than the world's ultimate mobile fraternity. Players spend hours each day in the locker room, on the range, on the practice tee and on the course in the company of extremely close acquaintances, who, on the ultimate level, are also rivals and competitors. Such an environment fosters an almost palpable spirit of one-upmanship.

"It's kind of weird when you're a rookie because there's a constant back-and-forth between the veterans, and it all seems like inside jokes," says Bubba Watson, a newcomer who leads the PGA Tour in driving distance. "It's almost like the older guys are too nice, sort of formal. I've been told you know you've been accepted as part of the fraternity out here when guys start ribbing you."

In a world in which the needling never ends, those with the sharpest tongues, quickest wits and most uncanny timing achieve almost reverential status. After all, everyone on tour can play golf. But only a select few have mastered the game of gotcha.