CHARLOTTE, N.C. — President Obama has gone full celebrity on us. He cannot run on the actual record of his first term, so he reaches back for that old magic from four years ago that helped him cross over from politician to full-blown icon.
No longer does he grant interviews to the regular political media — as if they were tough on him to begin with. Instead, he goes for puff pieces with celebrity grocery aisle magazines.
This, apparently, is because Mr. Obama is a racist. That, according to many Democrats who lashed out at "racist" Republicans four years ago who ridiculed the president for his celebrity status.
Remember the ad in which Mr. Obama was compared to Paris Hilton?
"Deliberately and deceptively racist," swore liberal radio host Bill Press.
The New York Times reported that, with the ad, Republicans had injected race into the campaign. By the way, it probably should be noted for anyone left on the planet who does not already know this, Paris Hilton is white. Every square inch of her body is white, as has been widely established all across the World Wide Web.
Even Mr. Obama himself suggested that Republicans were dragging race into the campaign by discussing his celebrity status.
Well, now the president has joined up with all the racists to promote his celebrity status. I guess having to explain how you blew $5.4 trillion in less than four years would make a guy do just about anything.
He made history by being the first president to sit for an interview with Glamour magazine. He does countless interviews with local radio stations — after agreeing on the topics of the interview.
"I just flirted with the president of the United States of America," squealed one interviewer after grilling Mr. Obama on, among other similarly hard-hitting topics, his favorite color.
Even the first lady has crossed over to the dark side of racism by capitalizing on all the celebrity.
On Tuesday, she phoned into radio personality Ryan Seacrest and talked about how long it takes to get her makeup on and do her hair in the morning.
That's it! FOUR MORE YEARS!!!
Then she talked all about her daughters' first day of school and how she gave them a pep talk.
"We're going to have great attitudes, we're excited, I want you to stay focused, and be positive, and don't be afraid to ask for help, don't procrastinate," she said she told them.
Talk about a jobs program!
And she enthused about her speech and how she wanted to remind the world what a sweet guy her husband is, which perhaps explains why he burned through so much of our money.
"I get to share stories about what it was like when we were first dating and what kind of dad he is, so it's a real personal speech for me," she explained. "It was fun to go down memory lane just creating it."
Remember the good old days when President Obama's family was off limits to the media?
Daughters Sasha and Malia were to be allowed to grow up in as normal lives as possible, and Michelle Obama would be granted great deference from the political vitriol so she could focus on her do-gooder causes, like trying to get kids to be less fat?
"From the beginning of the administration, the White House has asked news outlets not to report on or photograph the Obama children when they are not with their parents and there is no vital news interest," the administration explained.
Unless, of course, you cannot explain how you blew through $5.4 trillion dollars with nothing to show for it but you still want to keep your job.
• Charles Hurt can be reached at email@example.com.