Sex is everywhere. It’s all over television, in our magazines, saturating our music and displayed by our dress. It is assumed we will have sex outside marriage, and when we do not we find ourselves under extreme pressure.
If we give in, we often find our reputations destroyed. On one hand, we are told to embrace freedom through sexual liberation. On the other hand, we hear a voice whispering that we should embrace the old-fashioned virtue of chastity.
Yet is chastity an old-fashioned virtue that no longer has a place in our lives? How can we possibly revive the virtue of chastity in our sex-soaked society?
First, we must understand exactly what chastity is. Chastity is more then “not having sex,” yet when you mention it, this is usually the first thing that comes to mind. What else does chastity embody?
Chastity brings respect. When a person refrains from sexual relations before marriage he or she says to everyone, “I am valuable and I am worth waiting for.” When we respect ourselves, we demand respect from the world.
Chastity sets us free. True freedom comes from being able to stand before a mirror and love what we see. By embracing chastity, we remove ourselves from the need to use our bodies as our chief advertisement. This beautiful virtue enables us to say, with conviction: “My body is perfect. Nothing needs to be changed. I love myself.”
Chastity weeds out those who wish to use us because we avoid the painful question, “Is he/she really in love with me or are just trying to get me in bed?”
Chastity gives us a measure of safety. By avoiding multiple sexual partners, we also avoid the dangerous sexually transmitted diseases running rampant around us.
We also avoid a crisis pregnancy at a most inopportune time of our lives. Children are a gift but not everyone has the money or the time to take on the responsibility of parenthood.
How is it possible to embrace chastity with sex bombarding us from every direction? First and foremost, we must create a chaste environment. This involves removing lustful music, immodest clothing, televisions shows and movies that focus heavily on sexual themes. We must also avoid magazines and other forms of entertainment that do the same.
The idea music, clothing, and entertainment that embody purity are “boring” and “geeky” is one of the many lies society has tried to sell us. There are just as many wonderful music CDs, movies, and styles of clothing out there that can entertain us and bring us a clean, smut-free environment.
To embrace the freedom of chastity, we have to do something about it. A serious search on the Internet or even by word-of-mouth can produce excellent resources for modest clothing and music. Limiting our television and movie viewing to things that respect modesty is entirely in our power. Being responsible while using the Internet is another way we can clean up what we allow into our lives.
We can embrace the old habit known as “custody of the eyes.” This involves simply not looking at anything that offends our sense of modesty. Custody of the eyes extends to men as well as women and can do enormous good when we are in uncomfortable situations at work or walking down the street.
The biggest weapon against impurity is our will power. We cannot expect ourselves to be chaste on a date if we are not chaste in all other areas of our lives. When we go on a date, rather then using the time to kiss and to touch, why not work on building a relationship? Work on a hobby, go on a nature walk, or get involved in group activities with other like-minded couples. Sit down and have long discussions with one another. There’s more to compatibility then sex.
We should view dating as a way to get to know a potential spouse and save sex for when we are wed.
Finally, we can tell others there is more out there then the sex-obsessed focus found in the main-stream world. We don’t have to be sheep: We can think and decide for ourselves, even when our decisions run counter to society.
We can revive the virtue of chastity if we so desire. All it takes is an honest dose of will power and carefully cleaning up things around us that influence our thoughts and our feelings. Just because sex is everywhere doesn’t mean we have to get caught up in it.
MICHELLE THERESE
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