- The Washington Times - Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Advice compiled and condensed from actual sources by Kelly Jane Torrance, who composed the questions.

Maybe it was a big dose of holiday spirit(s). Or maybe it was just the drugs. On Christmas Day, I decided to give things with the love of my life another go. He is in jail, so our reconciliation isn’t quite like a normal reconciliation. Then again, our relationship never was like a normal relationship.

That’s the problem - all my friends and family are telling me to leave him for good. They say our physically and emotionally abusive relationship just isn’t good for me. But I give as good as I get. Plus, I’ve got his name tattooed on my body. Marriage is supposed to be permanent - so why aren’t I getting more credit for taking the cheater back?

- Amy Winehouse

Dear Amy,

Though marriage makes man and wife one flesh, it leaves ‘em still two fools.

- William Congreve

I want to give my kids what I never had - a father who’s there for them. In fact, I want to give lots of kids what I never had. I’ve decided that the three I have now isn’t enough - I want 10.

What do you think of having such a big family? The one I had growing up wasn’t that big. I’ve got such a great life. I’m still one of the world’s best-known movie stars - despite starring in some flops, upsetting just about everyone in Hollywood and jumping on various couches. Shouldn’t I share my great fortune with others?

- Tom Cruise

Dear Tom,

The great advantage of living in a large family is that early lesson of life’s essential unfairness.

- Nancy Mitford

As a star of the huge Harry Potter franchise, I was one of the best-known child actresses in the world. I’m now 18, though, and I don’t know that a decision I made when I was a kid is still the right one for me.

I’m taking a break next year to start at a university. I’m not sure I’ll want to return to acting. Some people think this is a stupid move - guys would line up to see me in a more adult role, after all. But I feel I’d like to live a different life for a while. Any advice for a girl in transition?

- Emma Watson

Dear Emma,

To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly.

- Henri Bergson

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