Brett Favre is becoming the Kelvin Sampson of the NFL, eternally in the news because of his cell phone.
It seems Favre is either passing along the playbook of the Packers to the Lions or instructing the injured Tony Romo on how to grit his teeth by cell phone or communicating with reporters by text message.
Favre, as the Wrangler-wearing everyman from Kiln, Miss., with the propensity to throw either a touchdown or an interception on each pass, attempted to correct the cell phone issue during his weekly press conference two days ago.
Favre denied calling Matt Millen, the deposed architect of the mess called the Lions. It was the other way around. Millen called Favre, and the two discussed hunting, fishing, skeet shooting, trapping and hiking. Typical guy stuff.
Favre said he did not spend an hour on the cell phone discussing the intricacies of the Packers’ offense with Millen, and even if he did, what would it matter?
These might as well be the George Plimpton-led Lions.
Jason Campbell could invite the defensive signal caller of the Lions into his huddle before each play this Sunday, and the Lions would not be able to stuff the play.
The Lions are one of the few teams that miss the NFL memo on parity each year. They do not win games. They accidentally stumble into the occasional victory because of statistical probability. It is awfully difficult to compile an 0-16 record, but the Lions are giving it the good old Pee Wee League try.
The NFL has made it clear that Favre has violated no rules regardless of what he did or did not say to Millen.
After all, teams routinely interrogate players who previously played a pivotal role with an upcoming opponent.
Favre has made a habit of explaining his version of conversations in recent months, going back to his interview with Fox News host Greta Van Susteren in the summer.
The interview dealt with the acrimony between Favre and the Packers and who was being nastier - Favre for ending his 15-minute retirement or the Packers for thinking Aaron Rodgers would lead them to the Super Bowl.
Given the nature of the divorce, it is not a stretch to think Favre would want to assist a team going against the Packers, even if he does have a bunch of close friends in Green Bay.
Favre knows he is playing in exile and, worse, does not look right in the uniform of the Jets.
In a related development, Favre said he did not perform a faith-healing maneuver on Romo’s right pinkie. Nor did Favre discuss hunting or the ins and out of the Packers’ offense with Romo or Jessica Simpson.
Favre said it was Romo who called him and that the quarterback of the Cowboys was merely looking to borrow a spare cup of toughness from him.
“I did not call the Lions, nor did I call Tony Romo,” Favre said. “I don’t know what else to tell everyone, but I’m not calling people.”
That undoubtedly would be a wise move on Favre’s part.
If not, reports possibly will surface that say Favre has been advising Tom Brady on the infection in his surgically repaired left knee.
Favre, of course, would be able to play through a torn anterior cruciate ligament.
Favre actually should have been relieved that reporters were more interested in his chitchat with Millen and Romo than his two-interception egg in Oakland on Sunday. The Raiders tried their best to lose the game, but Favre and the Jets just were not in the winning mood.
Favre did acknowledge that he is preparing to solve the Chiefs’ defense this Sunday, at least when he is not fielding phone calls from inquiring players and executives around the NFL.
The latter should stop pestering Favre.
As he said, “I don’t have time to be dealing with other issues, especially other game plans.”
Favre could turn off his cell phone, too.
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