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The U.S. Capitol is kept largely out of reach from American taxpayers.

Washington bureaucrats gone wild rival spring break revelers

It's that time of year when college kids in flip-flops hit the sandy beaches of cheesy Mexican resorts and party till the break of dawn, shimmying and jiggling and drinking florescent tequila shots from unknown belly buttons. Here in your nation's capital, it is really no different.

Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker laughs as he is introduced prior to his speech at Chatham House in central London, Wednesday, Feb. 11, 2015. Walker is leading a coalition of Wisconsin government and business officials on a trade mission in the UK that runs until Friday, Feb. 13, 2015. The trip gives him a chance to bolster his overseas and foreign policy credentials as he considers running for US President in 2016. (AP Photo/Lefteris Pitarakis)

Evolution and allegiance to the Church of Global Warming

It is such a high, blessed relief to finally get to the bottom of the most pressing issue here in this age of $17 trillion U.S. debt, barbaric animals burning humans alive in cages, the systematic rounding up, rape and mutilation of young girls around the world and all these inconvenient blizzards and bone-chilling winds blowing giant holes in our faith in the newly founded Church of Global Warming.

Cuomo

Mario Cuomo was not a total liar, and that's saying something

In all the stirring eulogies and remembrances leading up to the funeral of former New York Governor Mario Cuomo last week, his greatest contribution to American politics went entirely unheralded. All the fawning tributes and tearful, pearl-clutching accolades have failed to include the one single thing about Mario Cuomo that will forever set him far apart from all the rest of the politicians of his ilk.

President Barack Obama speaks to military members and families at Joint Base McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst, in Wrightstown, N.J., in this Dec. 15, 2014, file photo. (AP Photo/Mel Evans, File)

Welcome to lawless Obama's America, hombres!

Just when President Obama thought it was safe to show his face in an American courtroom again, in walks John Wayne in a black robe to deliver one of the greatest legal beatdowns ever suffered by a sitting president.

Lesley McSpadden, second from right, Michael Brown's mother, is comforted outside the Ferguson police department as St. Louis County Prosecutor Robert McCulloch conveys the grand jury's decision not to indict Ferguson police officer Darren Wilson in the shooting death of her son, Monday, Nov. 24, 2014, in Ferguson, Mo. (AP Photo/St. Louis Post-Dispatch, Robert Cohen)  **FILE**

Empty promises in wake of Ferguson

This was a tragedy that happened at the hands of Michael Brown himself. It happened at the hands of his parents who apparently failed to instill in him a respect for others. It happened at the hands of a society that failed to instill in him a respect for the law. It happened at the hands of an education system that failed to instill in Michael Brown that a box of Swisher Sweets is the reward for learning and hard work.

A police car is set on fire after a group of protesters vandalize the vehicle following the announcement of the grand jury decision in Ferguson, Missouri. A grand jury has decided not to indict Ferguson police officer Darren Wilson in the death of Michael Brown, the unarmed, black 18-year-old whose fatal shooting sparked sometimes-violent protests. (AP Photo/Charlie Riedel)

Ferguson riots are Obama's legacy

Now I realize that some in the media have taken grave exception to people referring to the riots in Ferguson as the "Ferguson riots." And I must say that I agree with them. They really are not the "Ferguson riots." They are the "Obama riots."