If Fedzilla were to overhaul the automobile industry like it proposes to overhaul Wall Street, I'm convinced it would demand the automobile industry produce cars without steering wheels.
Here we go again. Another 2,000-page bill that even "Countrywide" Christopher J. Dodd - chairman of the Senate Banking Committee and destructo-derby ace co-pilot of the not-so-good ship Freddie/Fannie debacle - admitted no one will know how it will work until it's implemented. I've got news for Mr. Dodd and his hearing-eye mutt Nancy Pelosi: No one will ever know how the bill will work because, like everything else Fedzilla massages, it can't work.
Back in America, Rep. Jeb Hensarling, Texas Republican, got it close to right when he stated, "My guess is that there are three unintended consequences on every page of this bill." You're too kind, Tex. The ruinous consequences are indeed intended.
My guess is that there are five per page. Fedzilla doesn't mess around when it comes to boondoggling.
As was the case with the massive 2,000-plus-page health care bill, not one Fedzillacrat who voted for the Wall Street overhaul bill has read it. This massive, unread bill now goes to the community-organizer-in-chief for him to sign into law. His specialty.
Fedzilla writes lengthy, confusing and contradictory bills for a reason. It doesn't want average Americans to understand truly what it's doing. And it has achieved that. Corruption Inc. rages on.
But though they have been successful at confusing Americans with 2,000-page bills, many Fedzillacrats will see their political careers come to a screeching halt this November because they have made these same Americans angry and confused. Americans have had enough of political shysters, lawyer lingo, doublespeak, crooks, liars and frauds in Washington. The Mao Zedong fan club will be looking for new digs by deer season.
If it weren't so pathetic, it would funny. Here we have the most inept, inefficient and ineffective bureaucracy known to man passing a law to overhaul the financial industry without addressing the primary cause of the economic meltdown: its own little Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac joke.
Fannie and Freddie are government-controlled entities that guaranteed hundreds of billions of dollars in home loans - meaning, of course, that the taxpayer guaranteed hundreds of billions in loans - loans that all players knew were never going to be paid back. Good call, Fedzilla. Your reputation builds toxic steam. You are on course.
Countrywide Dodd, Connecticut Democrat, and Rep. Barney "Fraud" Frank, Massachusetts Democrat, supported the passage of this bill but did not support overhauling Fannie and Freddie a couple of years ago when they were warned time and time again that Fannie and Freddie were on very thin financial ice, if not in a downright flaming tailspin. A type of spin I hear ol' Barney is into.
Countrywide Dodd and Barney Fraud intentionally avoided these warning signs and drove our economy off a cliff. The warning signs for Fannie and Freddie were so large that even the hapless Keystone Kops could have saved our economy.
And now these two frauds want to overhaul Wall Street. Only in the District of Clowns (D.C.) could this possibly happen. The District of Clowns is the Romper Room for adult idiots. Who's in charge, Captain Kangaroo?
Now we are supposed to believe this behemoth bill will prevent our economy from collapsing in the future? Right. And I will be leading the next gay rights parade in Fallujah.
Give me a break. Not only will it not prevent future economic calamities, but my money says it will also cause future economic calamities if the Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) is in charge of administering and enforcing it. Never forget, Bernie "The Ponz" Madoff committed a $50 billion crime right under the SEC's nose. I'm surprised Fedzilla didn't hire Jeffrey Dahmer as official children's day care czar in Puerto Rico.
I don't have any faith in Fedzilla. The typical end result of Fedzilla's meddling is that problems only get larger and more expensive. The majority of Americans agree with my assessment.
The District of Clowns is a self-licking ice-cream cone that truly requires a top-to-bottom overhaul. The Fedzillacrats in the District of Clowns cause more problems for our economy than all the frauds and crooks on Wall Street. I would much rather put our country's future in the hands of Wall Street than in the bumbling hands of Fedzilla.
Believe it. See you in deer season. It's also varmint season. Good hunting.
Ted Nugent is an unstoppable American rock 'n' roll, sporting and political activist icon. He is author of "Ted, White & Blue: The Nugent Manifesto" and "God, Guns and Rock 'N' Roll" (Regnery Publishing).