- The Washington Times - Friday, June 17, 2005

Nobles: Queen Elizabeth II, for showing the spirit to learn a new technology.

The word from Britain’s The Sun is that Elizabeth has bought herself an Apple iPod — proving yet again that the juggernaut of American ingenuity can scale any societal height, no matter how ancient the institution. Her ancestor, King George III — who spent eight years trying to keep those pesky colonials in order — must be rolling in his grave.

Don’t think that the 79-year-old head of the commonwealth and the defender of the faith could just go to London’s nearest Apple store and pick up the digital music player. Apparently, she had her son, Prince Andrew, the Duke of York, buy her one — which makes comedy writers everywhere regret that he isn’t the Duke of Earl.

The interesting thing is that throughout her reign Elizabeth has exuded grace and dignity, perhaps in an attempt to defend the monarchy from the coarsening of British culture. This also means that she is detached — a figurehead much more than a personality.

There’s nothing, however, that says a queen can’t still honor the national legacy while enjoying the innovations of the modern world. That a vast majority of those innovations come from the country that once inherited England’s free-market tradition is of course no coincidence.

For proving that the oldest generations get still “get jiggy with it,” Queen Elizabeth II is the Noble of the week.

Knaves: The Democratic leadership, for blaming everyone but themselves.

It’s been a tough couple of weeks for the leaders of the Democratic Party. First, they had to deal with their chairman, Howard Dean, who is doing his best to keep “white Christians” as far away from the Democratic Party as possible. Now, it’s Senate Minority Whip Dick Durbin, who just happened to compare American soldiers to Nazis.

What’s infuriating is that whenever a Democratic luminary goes before the cameras to initiate damage control he ends up sounding hopelessly immature. Mr. Dean blamed the controversy over his uncouth remarks on the Republicans, because its “exactly what [they] want.” Democratic Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid, responding to Mr. Durbin’s unfortunate analogy, said, “The noise machine from the far right never stops … This is all a distraction by the White House.” For his part, Mr. Durbin has also blamed the “right-wing media.”

So, the Republicans and the White House are supposedly to blame for what Democrats say. No doubt it’s all part of some insidious Karl Rove plot. As for the “right-wing media,” Democrats apparently think it’s incredibly unfair that reporters actually report what a politician has said. Here’s some free advice to Democrats: Stop saying stupid things.

For their childish refusal to accept responsibility, the Democratic leaders are the Knaves of the week.

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