- - Wednesday, December 14, 2011

At least the Three Stooges were hilarious. The Occupy stooges are much different, though they certainly qualify for classic numskull stooges nonetheless. They are dirty, political punks. I seriously doubt the majority of them could identify five reasons why they are protesting. No one else in the country can.

You don’t need to search the Internet far to read story after story of the Occupy stooges committing crimes, fighting the cops, destroying personal property, stinking the place up and engaging in other noble expressions of First Amendment rights. I find that beautiful - priceless, actually. Only human cockroaches spotlight themselves.

The Occupy stooges are almost as funny and goofy as the Three Stooges.

What America is witnessing is the Democratic Party on parade. I say let the parade of simple stooges continue. Let them continue to demand something for nothing, try and close down streets, fight with the cops, live in filth, dance like Timothy Leary zombies. It’s beautiful. It’s so Democratic Party.

Let working hard, playing hard mom-and-pop America witness the Democratic Party in all its shameless, numskull and dirty glory. As the party clowns work tirelessly to falsely paint conservatives as heartless, cold, evil, sexist and racist, I say conservatives should do whatever we can to encourage the Occupy stooges to stay on course, painting themselves for what they are.

While I don’t condone violence, watching the cops pounce on and pepper-spray a few Occupy stooges and then drag the dirtballs off to jail in shackles is good for my conservative soul and gold for my sense of humor. Everyone needs at least one hearty laugh every day.

You have to admit that watching a stinky, dirty hippie being dragged off to jail is as funny watching James Brown drive across railroad tracks on the rims of his pickup truck, listening to Joe Biden stick his foot in his mouth, or watching Moe hit Larry and Curly with a pipe wrench. This is funny stuff, funny stuff. Lighten up.

What America is witnessing by watching the Occupy clown brigades is the future of America if the Democratic Party is in control. What America needs to witness and have seared into our consciousness are the Occupy stooges, those proud socialist punks who want something for nothing.

Americans should not forget how the Occupy stooges destroyed property and got dragged off to jail. Let us also not forget how the Tea Party goes about peacefully protesting and no one gets hauled off to jail. Quite a difference. Remember that, America.

The Occupy stooges are an early conservative Christmas present. Sit back, pop some popcorn with real butter and watch the base of the Democratic Party on parade. They are providing a great source of entertainment, plus many of them get dragged off to jail. Who could not possibly find this funny and entertaining? Don’t get angry with the Occupy stooges, encourage them. They are the “dream ticket” for conservatives and the Republican Party.

Come on, Mr. President, the least you can do for us evil conservatives is encourage the base of your party to continue marching, protesting, whining, raising havoc and demanding something for nothing. March with them, Mr. Obama, and stand up for real community organizing.

Ted Nugent is an American rock ‘n’ roll, sporting and political activist icon. He is the author of “Ted, White, and Blue: The Nugent Manifesto” and “God, Guns & Rock ‘N’ Roll” (Regnery Publishing).

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