Whoa. Commercial marijuana.
It must be mighty fun to grow marijuana without breaking the law. Smoke marijuana with breaking the law. Get a prescription for marijuana without breaking the law.
Hey, brother, can you spare a dime? A dime bag, that is.
Sure, I just dated myself. The point is, like, totally important, dude.
Many of you were naive enough to think that pro-potheads merely wanted illness-stricken people to be able to be prescribed marijuana legally so that they could smoke to feel better. Many of them needed it to bring on an appetite. They gave a new meaning to the munchies, and you hadn’t even seen Sir Smoke-a-Lot’s antics in “Half-Baked” or realized that Tommy Chong’s hair and beard had grayed.
Now you realize that the original premise — aiding sick people — is, well, up in smoke.
What potheads want is to decriminalize a federally controlled substance, and that’s no secret.
The medical experts, policymakers and legislators, and pot growers and pot smokers joined forces yesterday in the Washington Hilton, where President Reagan was shot in 1981 and where the White House Correspondents’ Association holds it annual dinner and celeb fest.
The event is billed as the High Times Business Summit — the same High Times counterculturists who started the pro-legalization magazine 40 years ago. So now you get the contact, eh?
Anyway, if you don’t think the agenda isn’t to flip the script on prohibition, continue reading, please.
In late February, Congress failed to quash D.C. legislation that bolstered recreational pot use. That inaction had already followed approval of “medical marijuana.”
With prescriptions doled out, dispensaries in place and recreational use OK’d, the next logical step in the pot movement is commercial sales, and believe me, Alice B. Toklas’ brownies ain’t what’s happening, man. Oh, and every respectable pothead calls it the “cannabis industry,” thank you very much, not pot or weed.
These days the cannabis industry makes such quality products G Stiks, Moxie Seeds and Extracts, and Liquid Gold — not the Scott’s brand, mind you. G FarmaLabs’ brand, which also sells teas and vaporizing products.
And you thought that young lady was smoking a gold-plastic-tipped cigarillo. Ha!
What’s worst is that our people — people with serious mental and emotional issues, people no longer able to tend to themselves, people who wanted to get high for the sake of getting high — are smoking this stuff. Some of them are even smoking it with “synthetic marijuana.”
So why is High Times in the District if the city is already lit up?
“It’s key in keeping awareness top of mind in our nation’s capital, where key members of the executive, judicial and legislative branches live and work,” said David Kohl, president of High Times mag. “Because the District of Columbia was a first mover on the East Coast, it’s an important reason why we chose to have our first business to business summit here.”
Ryan McDermott, one of my colleagues, also got Mr. Kohl to spill the beans about the High Times summit: “A key benefit would be to enable cannabis-oriented business activity, innovation and economic development to flourish here.”
Mr. Kohl and other pro-potheads are going to be rattling off numbers while they are summiting, giving lefties ammunition to push against state and federal prohibitions against pot laws.
In calling for taxation of marijuana, they’ll cite more money for schools, more money for public safety, more money for roads and transportation. They’ll say we’ll even get got more money for substance abuse treatment.
Whew. Seems like we’ve discussed this before.
Lovers who want to go all the way?
Legalize “commercial” marijuana?
We are not ready.
• Deborah Simmons can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.