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The unicorn is an elusive beast. Though intemperate, sometimes ferocious and on occasion even savage, often unable to control itself, such a beast is exceedingly rare. No one has ever captured one. Nancy Pelosi, however, claims to have seen at least one in her garden. So have other Democrats.
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The end is near. The man in the sandwich board bearing that dread message in a thousand cartoons, the object of laughter and derision, is about to be vindicated.
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Robert Mueller is said to be hitting his old textbooks from law school, perhaps an early chapter on how to keep the clock running on a rich client. Lawyers charge by the hour and a clever Blackstone can keep the meter running until the 12th of Never.
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Life sometimes imitates art, often bad art. Actors live and work in a make-believe world, and when they step outside that world they're naturally confused about which world they're in.
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Presidents have ways to get things done that speakers of the House don't, a lesson that Nancy Pelosi is just now learning.
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There's a barroom in the Bronx missing a serving wench. She went off to Congress to enact into law some of the more imaginative ideas she heard serving suds to know-it-alls at her bar.
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Virginia has always had a weakness for minstrelsy, but the current epidemic of low officials in high places auditioning as lovers and blackface minstrels is something almost new.
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The first rule of politics is simple, logical and often difficult to obey. Tempting as it may be otherwise, when your opponent is destroying himself, your strategy should be to shut up, stand back and stay out of his way.
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We're not any longer talking about abortion, the issue that has bitterly divided us for decades. Now we're talking about the step beyond interfering with the process of creating a human life. We're talking about "murder," perhaps the ugliest word in the language.
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Congress, the butt of so many jokes over the centuries of the American experiment, may have stumbled onto a quack cure for what ails it. Some senators, of both the Republican and Democratic persuasions, are talking about passing a law to require Congress to stifle itself when it is called on to deal with a budget.
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These are the best of times, these are the worst of times. (Charles Dickens only thought his age was confused.) You only have to read the newspapers to see why.
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The New York Times thinks ours is "a golden age for journalism." The press, the Old Gray Lady says, "has come through with some investigative work that can stand with the finest Watergate-era reporting."
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Business schools are growing like weeds in the nation's universities, many of them endowed by the smart, the clever, and the innovative upon whom capitalism has not merely smiled, but laughed out loud.
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There's a politically incorrect question hanging over Washington that it's almost safe to ask: How much longer can Robert Mueller spin his client-for-life until even Nice People start asking questions?
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Not all ghouls live in the graveyard. Some of them are busy in the capital sunshine, making book on Ruth Bader Ginsburg's chances of returning to the U.S. Supreme Court and staying there to assist in the rendering of Donald Trump and his administration as dead as one of those graveyard ghouls.
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A schoolmarm's lot, like that of a policeman's, is not a happy one, particularly if her lot is a roomful of noisy children whose ignorance is boundless and who have only a small ambition to do anything about it. Shed a bipartisan tear for Nancy Pelosi.
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Thursday was a strange day in Washington. There was the changing, not of the guard but of half of the Congress, and Nancy Pelosi and House Democrats acted as if she were Franklin D. Roosevelt (in drag) and it was 1932 and "happy days are here again."
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The Booger Man's gonna get you if you don't watch out. That's the media's message in the finding that at last there are more witches and wiccans than Presbyterians out there, waiting to pounce.
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Sooner or later, Robert Mueller, the last of the great white hunters, has to show what he's got, ready or not.
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Theresa May, who has mismanaged Britain's exit from the European Union, won her vote of confidence in the House of Commons this week, and now she's in the hard place the country preacher found himself after winning a vote of confidence to unify his congregation, soothe hurt feelings and make peace with his deacons.
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