The Washington Times - June 3, 2009, 06:09AM

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez claims that the CIA had planned to kill him during a planned trip to El Salvador, the AP is reporting.

Chavez said he canceled a trip to attend the inauguration of Salvadoran President Mauricio Funes because of the alleged plot. He said his country’s intelligence services had “precise information” about CIA plans to down his plane with rockets.


Chavez previously has accused the U.S. of trying to overthrow him or invade Venezuela, and the State Department has denied his charges.

This assassination plot story sounds a little too convenient.  I think Chavez just didn’t want to go to El Salvador and needed a good excuse: “Sorry, Mauricio. I’d like to go, but I can’t because … um … the CIA is trying to kill me! Yeah, that’s it. The CIA. They’re trying to kill me.”

There are tell-tale signs that the CIA is after you.  For instance, does your radio turn on by itself when you start your car?  That’s the CIA.  Does your cell phone service die when you enter a tunnel?  It’s the CIA.  Do you get a receipt with the time and date on it when you use an ATM?  That’s the CIA tracking you.