The Washington Times - January 12, 2008, 01:20PM

\ Roseanne (Barr) — you remember her, the comedienne with the great taste and fashion sense — has called out Barack Obama and his little pal Oprah, too. A bad idea to mess with the Queen O’Talk. Couple her with the Obama Mama and funny girl will never work again.\

\ Speaking of Barack, one-time presidential candidate John Kerry has endorsed him. That’s like having a sandbag tied around your neck, no? What’s next, Rosie? Barack must’ve been thinking: Just gimme your e-mail list and get out of here and party with Al Gore.\


\ Hollywood — like those folks are working, what with this writer’s strike — needs to get off its liposuctioned can and support Obama about now. Clooney, line one? He needs a bounce after New Hampshire, we think.\

\ We are super in love with the black band and diamonds bracelet worn on the trail by Ann Romney. We don’t think it’s a watch; she had a gold one on her other wrist, but this little sparkler is positively divine. If Mittens bought it for her, he has exceptional taste. Pizza and cold beer to the political junkie who can tell us what it is and where we can get one. It’s the important things that drive us this political season.\

\ Where is Judy Giuliani? Still at the spa? Just wondering.\

\ Here’s the guy you want as running mate for prez: Gene Simmons. You know the one: from KISS, big tongue, spits blood, “parties every day.” And now kicking butt and taking names on Donald Trump’s “Celebrity Apprentice.” He is a cunning … businessman. Probably worth checking out this show on ABC. He makes our fave Big Daddy, Dick Cheney, almost look like a wimp. We’d love to send Gene to Iran. (Cue mushroom cloud, incessant laughing, cocktails.) Wait: We are nominating him for Secretary of Defense, or State, or Global Head-Banging.\

\ — Andrea Billups, The Washington Times